1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:03,000 ANNOUNCER: We now return to 2 00:00:03,000 --> 00:00:04,000 "Thugnificent: Rags to Bitches." 3 00:00:04,000 --> 00:00:05,000 y'all know what a nigga moment is. 4 00:00:05,000 --> 00:00:06,000 A nigga moment is when the mind 5 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:07,000 The story of Thugnificent begins here... 6 00:00:07,000 --> 00:00:08,000 of a perfectly logical black man 7 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:09,000 is overwhelmed by some stupid nigga shit. 8 00:00:09,000 --> 00:00:11,000 I love you, Mommy. 9 00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Like when a nigga steps up on your sneaker Oh! 10 00:00:13,000 --> 00:00:14,000 and fucks up your kicks, or hits your car or some shit. 11 00:00:14,000 --> 00:00:15,000 Terra-Belle leads Georgia in homicides, infant mortality, 12 00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:16,000 MAN: This is our target -- the nuclear power plant. 13 00:00:16,000 --> 00:00:17,000 like it's your fault, like you fucked up. 14 00:00:17,000 --> 00:00:18,000 If we capture the plane at precisely the right moment, 15 00:00:18,000 --> 00:00:20,000 Ooh, Lord. So his ignorance makes you act crazy. 16 00:00:20,000 --> 00:00:21,000 Yo. What up? 17 00:00:21,000 --> 00:00:22,000 they will not have time to shoot down the aircraft. And the next thing you know, niggas is beefing, 18 00:00:22,000 --> 00:00:23,000 Yeah, I see you, too. What you want, nigga? 19 00:00:23,000 --> 00:00:25,000 Damn! shooting, fighting, and somebody ends up dead. 20 00:00:25,000 --> 00:00:26,000 Oh, man, same shit. What's up with you? 21 00:00:26,000 --> 00:00:27,000 MAN: If they hit that power plant 22 00:00:27,000 --> 00:00:28,000 The fuck you mean, "What's up with me?" 23 00:00:28,000 --> 00:00:29,000 Yes, sir. That's our name for it. 24 00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:30,000 the casualties could be in the hundreds of thousands. 25 00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:31,000 Your voice sounds real sexy right now. 26 00:00:31,000 --> 00:00:32,000 God help us all. 27 00:00:32,000 --> 00:00:33,000 Say what? 28 00:00:33,000 --> 00:00:34,000 Okay. Ready? 29 00:00:34,000 --> 00:00:35,000 You wanna talk to me later on? 30 00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:36,000 No, I don't wanna talk later on, motherfucker. 31 00:00:36,000 --> 00:00:37,000 ANNOUNCER: ...except... 32 00:00:37,000 --> 00:00:39,000 What the fuck is wrong with you?! 33 00:00:39,000 --> 00:00:40,000 What the fuck's so sexy about my voice? 34 00:00:40,000 --> 00:00:41,000 What? What is this CPT? that hell had ever seen. 35 00:00:41,000 --> 00:00:42,000 Aw, man, my bad. I was on the phone. 36 00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:43,000 None for me, thanks. 37 00:00:43,000 --> 00:00:44,000 Tom, I think you can have WOMAN: That means the plane is gonna I swear to God, man, they actually, like, 38 00:00:44,000 --> 00:00:45,000 a second glass on your anniversary. 39 00:00:45,000 --> 00:00:46,000 Colonel motherfucking Stinkmeaner, 40 00:00:46,000 --> 00:00:47,000 I'm driving, sweetie-pooh. This sucks. 41 00:00:47,000 --> 00:00:48,000 ANNOUNCER: They picked the wrong airline. holler at your boy, I gets money. 42 00:00:48,000 --> 00:00:49,000 Bitches like this shit, man. 43 00:00:49,000 --> 00:00:50,000 And don't come up here complaining and shit. And I started thinking to myself: "Man... 44 00:00:50,000 --> 00:00:51,000 They be thinkin' I'm one of them Mens in Black You know what's wrong with me. 45 00:00:51,000 --> 00:00:52,000 You motherfuckers wanna come on here or somethin' like that, you know? 46 00:00:52,000 --> 00:00:53,000 and act a goddamn fool? 47 00:00:53,000 --> 00:00:54,000 could kill me or you, or somebody's baby. Y'all gonna have to kick me out of this bitch. 48 00:00:54,000 --> 00:00:55,000 I'm about to go on break. 49 00:00:55,000 --> 00:00:56,000 You motherfucking terrorists kill me. They be wondering where the black limo is at I'm saying you probably never looked like this damn picture. 50 00:00:56,000 --> 00:00:57,000 I'd spend the next 20 years in jail being-- 51 00:00:57,000 --> 00:00:58,000 when they see -- All they see is the headpiece, 52 00:00:58,000 --> 00:00:59,000 BOTH: Anally raped. This ain't you! 53 00:00:59,000 --> 00:01:00,000 Yeah, let's talk more that's where the police station used to be. 54 00:01:00,000 --> 00:01:01,000 the devil himself, a-- 55 00:01:01,000 --> 00:01:02,000 about your violated rectum. ANNOUNCER: Come see why black incompetence... 56 00:01:02,000 --> 00:01:03,000 Oh, I find it so romantic. Yes! 57 00:01:03,000 --> 00:01:04,000 'cause, uh, they up and left. TOM: Hey, I'm just saying-- 58 00:01:04,000 --> 00:01:05,000 Whoo, whoo! Well, excuse me for thinking you liked me 59 00:01:05,000 --> 00:01:06,000 So where's the new police station? Goddamn, that bitch phat as a motherfucker. 60 00:01:06,000 --> 00:01:07,000 So... for who I was on the inside. 61 00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:09,000 Well, you're a liar on the inside. Last week, right, I was in the strip club, right. ...is our funniest weapon in the war on terror. 62 00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:10,000 No, thank you. This whole relationship is based on a lie. 63 00:01:10,000 --> 00:01:11,000 I had titties in one hand, titties in the other hand. 64 00:01:11,000 --> 00:01:12,000 Ah! You baldheaded devil monks 65 00:01:12,000 --> 00:01:13,000 We can't let you through, homey. 66 00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:14,000 Hey, this is Osama bin Laden nephew, nigga. 67 00:01:14,000 --> 00:01:15,000 I had two hands full of titties. 68 00:01:15,000 --> 00:01:16,000 Well, I-- I'm -- I'm once removed. I-I-- 69 00:01:16,000 --> 00:01:17,000 That's bigger than two scoops of raisins. 70 00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:18,000 So, what was it like No -- I just fucking with you, dawg. 71 00:01:18,000 --> 00:01:19,000 I'm still talkin' to my accountant at the same time. 72 00:01:19,000 --> 00:01:20,000 Go ahead, nigga. 73 00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:21,000 ANNOUNCER: Starring Gary Anthony Williams. What's not to like about that? 74 00:01:21,000 --> 00:01:22,000 Nigga, you ain't no Denzel. 75 00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:24,000 But you know what they say -- when it's your time to go, 76 00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:25,000 Hell, you ain't even no Flavor Flav. it's your time to go. John Witherspoon. 77 00:01:25,000 --> 00:01:26,000 or when you're talkin' on the goddamn phone. Time after time after time. 78 00:01:26,000 --> 00:01:27,000 What if it's the motherfucker next to me time to go? Huh? 79 00:01:27,000 --> 00:01:28,000 Second, when people wear those things, Mm-hm. 80 00:01:28,000 --> 00:01:29,000 I see ya. 81 00:01:29,000 --> 00:01:30,000 Lock 'em up. Charge them with fraud. Mo'Nique. It's very important 82 00:01:30,000 --> 00:01:31,000 But that's real shit, though, nigga. TOM: Ah. Now, that's what There's a name for people who talk to theyselves, Ed. 83 00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:32,000 this plane leave on time. You got naked kids. 84 00:01:32,000 --> 00:01:33,000 I say give them the chair. Electrocute their ugly asses. 85 00:01:33,000 --> 00:01:34,000 Damn. Now, are you yelling at me or shitting at me? You got parents gotta choose between food and clothes 86 00:01:34,000 --> 00:01:35,000 has earned you a trip back. 87 00:01:35,000 --> 00:01:36,000 Snoop Dogg. Hijacked? for their kids, shorty. 88 00:01:36,000 --> 00:01:38,000 Them niggas ain't getting my wizzie fo' shizzle, nigga. You have my blessings to exact vengeance 89 00:01:38,000 --> 00:01:39,000 I don't know what to do with my hands now. 90 00:01:39,000 --> 00:01:40,000 You know what I'm saying? And 50 Cent Be that as it may, no technology is worth my dignity. 91 00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:41,000 and to spread ignorance and chaos 92 00:01:41,000 --> 00:01:42,000 Or for themselves. as Air Marshal 50 Cent. 93 00:01:42,000 --> 00:01:43,000 If talking on a wireless headset mean I gotta look 94 00:01:43,000 --> 00:01:44,000 ...people are looking. 95 00:01:44,000 --> 00:01:45,000 I'll stop those terrorists... 96 00:01:45,000 --> 00:01:46,000 Tom, please. 97 00:01:46,000 --> 00:01:47,000 or die trying. 98 00:01:47,000 --> 00:01:48,000 Besides, there's a reason 99 00:01:48,000 --> 00:01:50,000 Honey. Honey, maybe this isn't the best place to be singing-- 100 00:01:50,000 --> 00:01:51,000 STINKMEANER: Ah! Hell ain't shit. 101 00:01:51,000 --> 00:01:52,000 It lets people around you know you're talkin' on the phone. Get ready. This time, it's going down. 102 00:01:52,000 --> 00:01:54,000 I'm gonna get you, Freeman! 103 00:01:54,000 --> 00:01:56,000 So those people know not to waste time talkin' to you 104 00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:57,000 This is a hijacking. Remain in your seats -- 105 00:01:57,000 --> 00:01:58,000 Yay. All done. 106 00:01:58,000 --> 00:01:59,000 No, this nigga didn't. 107 00:01:59,000 --> 00:02:01,000 We have a bomb on the aircraft. 108 00:02:02,000 --> 00:02:03,000 Everyone remain -- 109 00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:04,000 Good. 110 00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:08,000 SARAH: Yay. 111 00:02:08,000 --> 00:02:09,000 Ah! Oh, my God. 112 00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:10,000 when you bend over. I like that a lot. 113 00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:12,000 What is it, honey? 114 00:02:12,000 --> 00:02:13,000 Wait. Is that Usher? GRANDDAD: Uh, ah, ooh, ooh. 115 00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:14,000 I'm about to go get dressed. 116 00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:15,000 Yes! Oh, my God. 117 00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:16,000 Oh. Mm-hm. 118 00:02:16,000 --> 00:02:17,000 I hate these fucking headsets. 119 00:02:17,000 --> 00:02:18,000 He's coming over. 120 00:02:18,000 --> 00:02:19,000 We gonna fly on the Soul Plane! 121 00:02:19,000 --> 00:02:20,000 I can't believe this. 122 00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:23,000 TOM: Oh, sweetie, 123 00:02:23,000 --> 00:02:24,000 Hey, how you doin', babe? 124 00:02:24,000 --> 00:02:26,000 Hey. Oh, ee-- Ee-- Hi, uh, uh, Mr. Usher. 125 00:02:26,000 --> 00:02:27,000 Uh-- Ah-- Ooh-- Yeah. Yeah. Yeah! 126 00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:28,000 -I can't believe it. -It's not true. 127 00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:29,000 I-- I can't believe it's you. 128 00:02:29,000 --> 00:02:30,000 This is, like, the greatest thing 129 00:02:30,000 --> 00:02:31,000 that ever happened in our neighborhood. 130 00:02:31,000 --> 00:02:32,000 I'm Sarah. 131 00:02:32,000 --> 00:02:33,000 ...where you can, like, track, like, if someone, like, 132 00:02:33,000 --> 00:02:34,000 You have a beautiful smile, Sarah. 133 00:02:34,000 --> 00:02:35,000 Mm-hm. 134 00:02:35,000 --> 00:02:37,000 Mm! Wow, so she's on my friends list? 135 00:02:37,000 --> 00:02:38,000 What's going on? What's going on? 136 00:02:38,000 --> 00:02:39,000 Yup, she your very first cyber friend 137 00:02:39,000 --> 00:02:40,000 A while for me? 138 00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:41,000 and you're her 3 millionth. 139 00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:42,000 SARAH: I love this song. She's fine, ain't she? 140 00:02:42,000 --> 00:02:43,000 GRANDDAD: Yeah, boy! I love technology. 141 00:02:43,000 --> 00:02:44,000 the community council meetings, Robert. 142 00:02:44,000 --> 00:02:45,000 I ain't worried about no damn council meeting. 143 00:02:45,000 --> 00:02:46,000 HUEY: My granddad recently 144 00:02:46,000 --> 00:02:48,000 for the okey-doke this time. Oh, wonderful. 145 00:02:48,000 --> 00:02:49,000 You should post more pics. Now I got the video chat. 146 00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:50,000 Thank you very much. Oh. Oh, God. Everybody get ready! GIRL 2: Oh, my gosh. 147 00:02:50,000 --> 00:02:51,000 Uh-- 148 00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:52,000 I'm starting to feel like Shemar Moore up in here. 149 00:02:52,000 --> 00:02:53,000 That was beautiful. It's just what I do. 150 00:02:53,000 --> 00:02:54,000 Oh, um, this is, uh...Tom. 151 00:02:54,000 --> 00:02:55,000 Hoo! Boy, let's get some music on. 152 00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:56,000 Why would she like you? 153 00:02:56,000 --> 00:02:57,000 Turn on the My-pod and let's get on the I-space. 'Cause your granddaddy gives sweet love. 154 00:02:57,000 --> 00:02:59,000 Yes, I'm Tom. Just Tom. RILEY: Wait, wait, wait. I know that song. 155 00:02:59,000 --> 00:03:00,000 GRANDDAD: Riley, hurry up. 156 00:03:00,000 --> 00:03:01,000 And what do you know about this woman? USHER: Hey, how 157 00:03:01,000 --> 00:03:02,000 The police were talking Well...her name is Luna. 158 00:03:02,000 --> 00:03:03,000 to everyone on our street for clues. you want next, Granddad? 159 00:03:03,000 --> 00:03:04,000 SARAH: You are so interesting. booty-butt cheeks 160 00:03:04,000 --> 00:03:05,000 Her hobbies include pets, traveling, kickbox-- 161 00:03:05,000 --> 00:03:06,000 The leather vest. The one with the rhinestones. We gonna fly on the Soul Plane! 162 00:03:06,000 --> 00:03:07,000 Well, almost everyone. 163 00:03:07,000 --> 00:03:08,000 B-B-B-Booty-Butt cheeks 164 00:03:08,000 --> 00:03:09,000 If you don't mind me asking, Watch when you go to sleep. 165 00:03:09,000 --> 00:03:10,000 And make sure you pee before we leave. Granddad, I-- 166 00:03:10,000 --> 00:03:11,000 I ain't gonna miss my movie I bet she have a gang of niggas up in here to rob us. 167 00:03:11,000 --> 00:03:12,000 going to the bathroom with you. GIRL: Thugnificent! Thugnificent, wait! 168 00:03:12,000 --> 00:03:13,000 Officer, I'm not finished. That ain't a good look, Granddad. 169 00:03:13,000 --> 00:03:14,000 I'm gonna let you go in there by yourself 170 00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:15,000 Not a good look? Hello, sir, I'm Officer Calloway. and get molested by a nasty white man. 171 00:03:15,000 --> 00:03:16,000 Is that some kind of new slang? 172 00:03:16,000 --> 00:03:17,000 Now, what's wrong with you? Why the long face? It's not just the music. I have seen all of your movies. 173 00:03:17,000 --> 00:03:18,000 What's wrong with you? Is that what's hot in the street, huh? 174 00:03:18,000 --> 00:03:19,000 I don't wanna go to the movie. Why not? Thugnificent and the Lethal Interjections living here. 175 00:03:19,000 --> 00:03:20,000 Uh...cheers. I don't ever wanna go to the movies with you again. 176 00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:21,000 I loved Light It Up. Talk and shoot at the same time, boy. 177 00:03:21,000 --> 00:03:22,000 Not after what happened last time. Thug who? Thugnificent. 178 00:03:22,000 --> 00:03:23,000 I named my dog Light It Up. Girl, please. "Beat It" or "Thriller"? 179 00:03:23,000 --> 00:03:24,000 What happened last time? I can't believe it. 180 00:03:24,000 --> 00:03:25,000 Neither have you. I don't know, Granddad. We got arrested. And shot at. 181 00:03:25,000 --> 00:03:26,000 is a common trait with black people. 182 00:03:26,000 --> 00:03:27,000 So funny. She's my manager. A whole weekend with a complete stranger? 183 00:03:27,000 --> 00:03:28,000 Ah. Racism. Take 'em back and go get my purple Speedo. 184 00:03:28,000 --> 00:03:29,000 Daddy said I can go to the movies, 185 00:03:29,000 --> 00:03:30,000 I'll call her. Hee-hee-hee. RILEY: Purple Speedo? 186 00:03:30,000 --> 00:03:31,000 but he said I'm not allowed to see Soul Plane. are culturally inclined against snitching. 187 00:03:31,000 --> 00:03:32,000 All right, boy, so you had a bad dream. 188 00:03:32,000 --> 00:03:33,000 Good. You don't wanna go to the movies with him. 189 00:03:33,000 --> 00:03:34,000 It was a really bad dream about-- Okay, one more. 190 00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:35,000 He's crazy. Hush. 191 00:03:35,000 --> 00:03:36,000 Please, we gotta get one more. Look at that one. Did you check the Speedo drawer? 192 00:03:36,000 --> 00:03:37,000 Can't see Soul Plane? Why, little baby? 193 00:03:37,000 --> 00:03:38,000 Man, fuck yo' mama! 194 00:03:38,000 --> 00:03:40,000 Shoot. I ain't ballin' like a rock star. Because of the types of stereos or something. 195 00:03:40,000 --> 00:03:41,000 It'd be good for my vocals. It was about Stinkmeaner. 196 00:03:41,000 --> 00:03:42,000 Types of stereos? an unwritten rule about snitching 197 00:03:42,000 --> 00:03:43,000 Oh. No, no, no, little baby doll. 198 00:03:43,000 --> 00:03:44,000 USHER: I'm gonna has become a full-blown "stop snitching" movement, 199 00:03:44,000 --> 00:03:45,000 Wouldn't let that shit happen to me though. 200 00:03:45,000 --> 00:03:46,000 This is a good theater. They have THX. 201 00:03:46,000 --> 00:03:47,000 USHER: You rollin' with Ush. 202 00:03:47,000 --> 00:03:48,000 Damn, these things are tight. What about Stinkmeaner? 203 00:03:48,000 --> 00:03:49,000 Take the murder of 19-year-old Jermaine "Lojack" Walker, 204 00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:51,000 He was in hell, and he was coming back to get us. 205 00:03:51,000 --> 00:03:52,000 She means stereotypes. That's right, y'all. Put your hands up, white folks! 206 00:03:52,000 --> 00:03:53,000 Stinkmeaner? Don't be crazy. Stereotypes? In Soul Plane? That's nonsense. 207 00:03:53,000 --> 00:03:54,000 That old man that Granddad killed for no reason? 208 00:03:54,000 --> 00:03:55,000 in the middle of a summer afternoon It's so good to finally meet you. 209 00:03:55,000 --> 00:03:56,000 Say, how about we tell your daddy No reason? That man was a psycho. 210 00:03:56,000 --> 00:03:57,000 Yes, yes, I see the ears. 211 00:03:57,000 --> 00:03:58,000 we saw something else, hm? Man, I wanna go over there, 212 00:03:58,000 --> 00:03:59,000 Nobody even called the cops. They all just went home. 213 00:03:59,000 --> 00:04:00,000 He was blind. You killed a blind old man. You mean...lie? 214 00:04:00,000 --> 00:04:01,000 Just like the picture, right? 215 00:04:01,000 --> 00:04:02,000 the slightest bit inappropriate? Would that be dick riding? You think? To go over there? 216 00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:03,000 That really doesn't seem to be a good idea. 217 00:04:03,000 --> 00:04:04,000 Hush, boy. And I sent him to hell where he belongs. 218 00:04:04,000 --> 00:04:05,000 You know, You look just like your picture too. 219 00:04:05,000 --> 00:04:06,000 it's okay to break the rules What it do, Woodcrest? Ha-ha! 220 00:04:06,000 --> 00:04:07,000 He asked me to send him the pictures. Yeah, Granddad, real tough with the handicapped. 221 00:04:07,000 --> 00:04:08,000 every once in a while. 222 00:04:08,000 --> 00:04:09,000 I won't tell if you won't. You damn right, Mr. Policeman! I saw the whole thing! 223 00:04:09,000 --> 00:04:10,000 He probably gonna beat up some retarded kids next. 224 00:04:10,000 --> 00:04:11,000 Okay. Hee-hee. 225 00:04:11,000 --> 00:04:12,000 which make sense, because she's 10. in our new crib in Woodcrest... 226 00:04:12,000 --> 00:04:13,000 HUEY: Sometimes I think Granddad may be a bad influence. 227 00:04:13,000 --> 00:04:14,000 What's that supposed to mean? that's what he's gonna do. 228 00:04:14,000 --> 00:04:15,000 It means you're a bit old to be acting and give him a pound and be like, "What up, Thugnificent?" 229 00:04:15,000 --> 00:04:16,000 Hey, Riley. Don't forget the camcorder. 230 00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:17,000 like some screaming TRL groupie. 231 00:04:17,000 --> 00:04:18,000 ...every cookout... 232 00:04:18,000 --> 00:04:19,000 Oh, yeah, your dream. 233 00:04:19,000 --> 00:04:20,000 Now, the first Soul Plane was funny. THUGNIFICENT: I'm here for everybody. 234 00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:21,000 Look, boy, 235 00:04:21,000 --> 00:04:22,000 Pfft. About as funny as a lynching. Get back here, Riley. ...every wedding... 236 00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:23,000 Oh, hush, boy. You ain't even see it. 237 00:04:23,000 --> 00:04:24,000 Stop the car! He can't hurt you or me or any of us, okay? 238 00:04:24,000 --> 00:04:25,000 I never seen a lynching, either, 239 00:04:25,000 --> 00:04:26,000 Uh, come on. You want a drink? but I know they not funny. 240 00:04:26,000 --> 00:04:27,000 Where I live, 241 00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:28,000 See? Shows what you know. I've seen funny lynchings. Now, let's get one more picture. 242 00:04:28,000 --> 00:04:29,000 I don't want either of you going near that house. You hear me? 243 00:04:29,000 --> 00:04:30,000 No, you haven't. I have so. 244 00:04:30,000 --> 00:04:31,000 They even have a club for snitches. 245 00:04:31,000 --> 00:04:32,000 Roscoe Patterson's lynching was funny. 246 00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:33,000 It's called the neighborhood watch. 247 00:04:33,000 --> 00:04:34,000 Yeah, so them niggas was like, of zombies or vampires, 248 00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:35,000 So I'm gonna just, uh, go back to the house. 249 00:04:35,000 --> 00:04:36,000 "Roscoe, you better leaves town 250 00:04:36,000 --> 00:04:37,000 Hold it right there, boy! LUNA: Oh, you're 251 00:04:37,000 --> 00:04:38,000 "before Mr. Charlie and them crackers THUGNIFICENT: ...our new crib in Woodcrest, 252 00:04:38,000 --> 00:04:39,000 Woodcrest neighborhood watch. 253 00:04:39,000 --> 00:04:40,000 gonna come for you." Oh. That Larry David is something else. Whoo! 254 00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:41,000 Now, where was you at 11:00 last night, huh? Huh?! 255 00:04:41,000 --> 00:04:42,000 I'm like, "Man, fuck them crackers, man. and bagels and shit. 256 00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:43,000 So... 257 00:04:43,000 --> 00:04:44,000 Come on, now! Don't lie to me, nigga! This is Roscoe Patterson." Nigga, I don't give a fuck. you never told me what kind of dogs you have. 258 00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:45,000 Nigga, I was in bed. We bring the 'hood with us, right here. 259 00:04:45,000 --> 00:04:46,000 I just don't give a fuck. 260 00:04:46,000 --> 00:04:47,000 That nigga's my age. But Stinkmeaner knew that every black man's spirit 261 00:04:47,000 --> 00:04:48,000 Know what I'm saying? White man can eat a dick. 262 00:04:48,000 --> 00:04:49,000 GIRL: Yeah. This is fantastic. So you guys don't think I'm overreacting? 263 00:04:49,000 --> 00:04:50,000 Eat my balls, nigga. Ha-ha. Whoo. That's right, nigga. 264 00:04:50,000 --> 00:04:51,000 I don't think so. 265 00:04:51,000 --> 00:04:52,000 MAN: There he is! Get that nigger. BOTH: Wolves? 266 00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:53,000 You're a bigtime lawyer, I'm about to do it big in Woodcrest, nigga. 267 00:04:53,000 --> 00:04:54,000 Uh-oh. The law say when the bicycle stop, You mean, like, wolf wolves? 268 00:04:54,000 --> 00:04:55,000 Oh, come on, you n-- Nincompoop. 269 00:04:55,000 --> 00:04:56,000 Come on, let's go! the wheels supposed to stop. Yeah. For some reason, wolves really like me. 270 00:04:56,000 --> 00:04:57,000 MAN: Oh, shoot, he's fast! Watch out! 271 00:04:57,000 --> 00:04:58,000 I was raised around wolves. You can't do that! Hey, come on. 272 00:04:58,000 --> 00:04:59,000 It, uh, wasn't really funny after that. 273 00:04:59,000 --> 00:05:00,000 They get a bad rap, but really, You can't hear the movie. 274 00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:01,000 Mm-mm. GIRL: Welcome to if you aren't afraid to establish dominance, 275 00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:02,000 This is gonna be so much fun. I'm calling the police. Stop! 276 00:05:02,000 --> 00:05:03,000 Huh? That's right, y'all. Thugnificent bringing the 'hood 277 00:05:03,000 --> 00:05:04,000 That's, uh... This is going to be... 278 00:05:04,000 --> 00:05:05,000 OLD MAN: Can we bring in the Army? 279 00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:06,000 ...the worst day of your life. How long will we wait on the police to protect us? 280 00:05:06,000 --> 00:05:07,000 Uh, fascinating. I had my blinker on and everything. 281 00:05:07,000 --> 00:05:08,000 Oh, I didn't say she was cheating. 282 00:05:08,000 --> 00:05:09,000 how long you been kickboxing? Fuck you, punk-ass, bougie-ass, hook-ass nigga! 283 00:05:09,000 --> 00:05:10,000 I'm bringing nunchucks. Can we bring in the Army?! 284 00:05:10,000 --> 00:05:11,000 I'll beat your motherfucking ass, nigga! 285 00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:12,000 This is a tragedy. Huh? Not exactly kickboxing, but it's kind of similar. 286 00:05:12,000 --> 00:05:13,000 The white man ain't never done nothin' to nobody, 287 00:05:13,000 --> 00:05:14,000 I say toss her groupie ass out the window 288 00:05:14,000 --> 00:05:15,000 Fuck with me, nigga, and I'll be popping a trunk 289 00:05:15,000 --> 00:05:16,000 and let that ho stargaze from outside. 290 00:05:16,000 --> 00:05:17,000 and he don't deserve this. You got some words of welcome 291 00:05:17,000 --> 00:05:18,000 Get my motherfucking Uzi. White Lotus? Now, Riley, there's never a place 292 00:05:18,000 --> 00:05:19,000 That's the deadliest style there is. 293 00:05:19,000 --> 00:05:20,000 for violence in a relationship. 294 00:05:20,000 --> 00:05:21,000 People, calm down. 295 00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:22,000 Thug out with the homey. There sure seemed to be a place at the restaurant last night. 296 00:05:22,000 --> 00:05:23,000 You never mentioned, uh, 297 00:05:23,000 --> 00:05:24,000 We've let the predators think we're weak. Mm-mm. Nappy-headed hos. 298 00:05:24,000 --> 00:05:25,000 Here, put these coats on. 299 00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:26,000 She made you look like a bitch in front of Usher. You know what, motherfucker? 300 00:05:26,000 --> 00:05:27,000 Huh? 301 00:05:27,000 --> 00:05:28,000 Boy, watch your mouth. he was a Shaolin monk. I learned it from him. 302 00:05:28,000 --> 00:05:30,000 Probably started out charitable. Oh, yeah? Well, fuck you, old-ass nigga! 303 00:05:30,000 --> 00:05:31,000 GRANDDAD: Here you go. It was them Freeman boys. Then I ended up having to use it on him, 304 00:05:31,000 --> 00:05:32,000 What is it? 305 00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:33,000 It's pinto beans and neck bones. You just mad at all this Thugnificence. 306 00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:34,000 But, Granddad, she did make Mr. DuBois look like a bitch. 307 00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:35,000 Now put this meat loaf and gravy under your shirt. 308 00:05:35,000 --> 00:05:36,000 Yeah, I said it. Respect it, man! 309 00:05:36,000 --> 00:05:37,000 Why don't we just get treats from the concession stand? -Now, Ruckus, that's crazy. -If they're so innocent, 310 00:05:37,000 --> 00:05:38,000 breathe it in, nigga. Bask in it. 311 00:05:38,000 --> 00:05:39,000 but find a different way to say it. 312 00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:40,000 Next thing you know, 313 00:05:40,000 --> 00:05:41,000 you rubbin' against that silky white skin. Oh. 314 00:05:41,000 --> 00:05:42,000 Now, where were we? You think I'm paying $20 for some popcorn? 315 00:05:42,000 --> 00:05:43,000 RUCKUS: Yeah. Why wouldn't they? 316 00:05:43,000 --> 00:05:44,000 But I don't know the non-curse way 317 00:05:44,000 --> 00:05:45,000 Have you heard of the Kumite? You must be out of your damn mind. 318 00:05:45,000 --> 00:05:46,000 to say he got bitched. 319 00:05:46,000 --> 00:05:47,000 Humiliated, castrated, emasc-- Oh-- Oh, my God. Did you say Kumite? 320 00:05:47,000 --> 00:05:48,000 Are we allowed to bring in food? 321 00:05:48,000 --> 00:05:49,000 Well, I don't really know much about him, Of course we're allowed to. 322 00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:50,000 I love talking to the police. but my two teenage kids are very excited. 323 00:05:50,000 --> 00:05:52,000 It's my food, isn't it? I paid for it. We're gonna go check 'em out. 324 00:05:52,000 --> 00:05:53,000 That means I can eat it when and where I want. Did-- Did anyone see who accosted this man? It's a mythical, invitation-only martial arts tournament 325 00:05:53,000 --> 00:05:54,000 If you lost your ho to T.I., 326 00:05:54,000 --> 00:05:55,000 I'd be like, "Hey, that's T.I." 327 00:05:55,000 --> 00:05:57,000 Boy, put this pot roast in your pants or you ain't eating. I got a date? I can't believe it. 328 00:05:57,000 --> 00:05:58,000 Oh, this is nothing. He's just getting started. and the dungarees with his name on the, um, pocket. 329 00:05:58,000 --> 00:05:59,000 is not a law-enforcement agency. 330 00:05:59,000 --> 00:06:00,000 You better check that ho, Mr. DuBois. 331 00:06:00,000 --> 00:06:01,000 You know what? You guys are right. But I didn't think the Kumite really existed. 332 00:06:01,000 --> 00:06:02,000 No interrogations! living across the street from me. Shoot. 333 00:06:02,000 --> 00:06:03,000 HUEY: Robert Jebediah Freeman Granddad, you don't skydive, 334 00:06:03,000 --> 00:06:04,000 had sworn a lifetime intifada Paid too much money for my house. Funny-ass music. 335 00:06:04,000 --> 00:06:05,000 It's really real. and ask them to join the neighborhood watch, 336 00:06:05,000 --> 00:06:06,000 against the movie theater industry 337 00:06:06,000 --> 00:06:07,000 and you never was a member of G-Unit. for exorbitant prices and poor customer service, 338 00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:08,000 want to go to a basketball game just to see the game, 339 00:06:08,000 --> 00:06:09,000 And let's all of us reach out to all our other neighbors 340 00:06:09,000 --> 00:06:10,000 Get 'em outta here. which, interestingly enough, 341 00:06:10,000 --> 00:06:11,000 come back with one of them NBA niggas out of sympathy? 342 00:06:11,000 --> 00:06:12,000 did not stop him from going to see movies. on some faraway mysterious island. 343 00:06:12,000 --> 00:06:13,000 MAN: Thugnificent and his cohorts, 344 00:06:13,000 --> 00:06:14,000 Okay, gang. Keep your eyes open. MAN: So, Mrs. Wong, 345 00:06:14,000 --> 00:06:15,000 She wanted to be entertained. 346 00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:16,000 Open for what? formed the Lethal Interjection Crew 347 00:06:16,000 --> 00:06:17,000 We're sneaking in. 348 00:06:17,000 --> 00:06:18,000 Oh, the white woman's got a big heart. 349 00:06:18,000 --> 00:06:19,000 That's not true, little baby. Kind of like one of them 350 00:06:19,000 --> 00:06:20,000 beating him senseless with a nine iron, 351 00:06:20,000 --> 00:06:21,000 I bought my tickets online. Scout's honor. "Booty-Butt Cheeks." 352 00:06:21,000 --> 00:06:22,000 stealing his wallet and driving his car 353 00:06:22,000 --> 00:06:23,000 Look. Granddad. They cover room and food. Everything. 354 00:06:23,000 --> 00:06:24,000 I got some money saved. The movie will be on me. 355 00:06:24,000 --> 00:06:25,000 multimillion-dollar major-label deal, 356 00:06:25,000 --> 00:06:26,000 Correct. 357 00:06:26,000 --> 00:06:27,000 Now, you put that away, boy. 358 00:06:27,000 --> 00:06:28,000 These movie devils ain't getting and a new album, "Rags to Bitches." 359 00:06:28,000 --> 00:06:30,000 any more of our money. You get to catch up with old friends, 360 00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:31,000 Mm-mm. see some really good matches, get a tan. Now, Mrs. Wong, let me ask you a question. 361 00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:32,000 Uh...Mr. Freeman? 362 00:06:32,000 --> 00:06:33,000 Ask the question, Miss von Hausen. Good times. 363 00:06:33,000 --> 00:06:34,000 The way I'm looking at it, I'm picking up where 364 00:06:34,000 --> 00:06:35,000 It says, "No outside food," little girl. Good times. The Kumite is supposed to be 365 00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:36,000 What's good, nigga? Is your granddad home? 366 00:06:36,000 --> 00:06:37,000 That's why we keep it inside our clothes. 367 00:06:37,000 --> 00:06:38,000 VON HAUSEN: Mr. Freeman, a death match, right? You ever killed anybody? 368 00:06:38,000 --> 00:06:39,000 This is the movement that says, you know -- Are you sure this is legal? 369 00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:40,000 Hey. Everybody has to die sometime. Hm. Granddad. Mr. DuBois' at the door. 370 00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:41,000 Now, as you know, we've had some home invasions recently. "Don't grow up and act like a fucking fool all the time, 371 00:06:41,000 --> 00:06:42,000 Okay, everybody, look alive now. Here's our chance. 372 00:06:42,000 --> 00:06:43,000 You's a bitch. 373 00:06:43,000 --> 00:06:44,000 and you can still make it up out the 'hood -Mm-hm. -We were concerned to hear 374 00:06:44,000 --> 00:06:45,000 and enjoy everything that life has to offer." 375 00:06:45,000 --> 00:06:46,000 I understand you need your job, that you refused to talk to the police. 376 00:06:46,000 --> 00:06:47,000 but you're still a human being with dignity. 377 00:06:47,000 --> 00:06:49,000 I would love to let you crash, Finish him. 378 00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:50,000 Yeah, I mean, look at this uniform, man. No snitchin'. 379 00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:51,000 I look like a fucking dork. 380 00:06:51,000 --> 00:06:53,000 Why would they make me dress like this? You've also refused our previous invitations 381 00:06:53,000 --> 00:06:54,000 What did I do to them, huh? 382 00:06:54,000 --> 00:06:55,000 to join the neighborhood watch, You should take action. 383 00:06:55,000 --> 00:06:56,000 and we could use your support. 384 00:06:56,000 --> 00:06:57,000 Ah. What can I do? 385 00:06:57,000 --> 00:06:58,000 Our motto is: Neighbors watching neighbors. 386 00:06:58,000 --> 00:07:00,000 Thank you so much, Robert. 387 00:07:00,000 --> 00:07:01,000 See, boys? See why 388 00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:02,000 Have you ever thought about forming a union? Fuck your court! 389 00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:03,000 Oh, I'm watchin', all right. I'm watchin' this neighborhood 390 00:07:03,000 --> 00:07:05,000 What's a "union"? RUCKUS: It's like somebody threw a million dollars 391 00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:06,000 MAN: Hey, hey, hey! Hey! become a bunch of damn tattletales. I mean, they can only hang you once, right? 392 00:07:06,000 --> 00:07:07,000 I paid. I got my ticket. 393 00:07:07,000 --> 00:07:08,000 Good one, granddad. 394 00:07:08,000 --> 00:07:09,000 Yeah, yeah. I got a ticket for you. 395 00:07:09,000 --> 00:07:10,000 You killin' 'em. 396 00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:11,000 A one-way ticket to "Get the hell Property was stolen, Mr. Freeman. Well, we can't live next to their kind. 397 00:07:11,000 --> 00:07:12,000 out of here, negro" land. 398 00:07:12,000 --> 00:07:13,000 Go on! Move it! Come on, now, you're leaving me hanging. 399 00:07:13,000 --> 00:07:14,000 The sanctity of our community was violated. 400 00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:15,000 I ain't gonna stand for it. 401 00:07:15,000 --> 00:07:16,000 ALL: We gotta go to the bathroom. 402 00:07:16,000 --> 00:07:17,000 Tough titty. We were here first. Right. 403 00:07:17,000 --> 00:07:18,000 I ain't got time for this bullshit. Oh... 404 00:07:18,000 --> 00:07:19,000 TOM: Well, I'd sell my house if I thought 405 00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:20,000 Nigga, you gay. it was still worth anything. 406 00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:21,000 How about that? 407 00:07:21,000 --> 00:07:22,000 Why don't you just invite them over for dinner See it's burnin' me to hold onto this. 408 00:07:22,000 --> 00:07:23,000 Another victory of the common man 409 00:07:23,000 --> 00:07:24,000 and get to know one another? HUEY: Meanwhile, I couldn't 410 00:07:24,000 --> 00:07:25,000 over corporate greed. 411 00:07:25,000 --> 00:07:26,000 You're not advancing any struggle RUCKUS: Sorry he touched you, Miss von Hausen. 412 00:07:26,000 --> 00:07:27,000 that an evil force was gathering. 413 00:07:27,000 --> 00:07:28,000 by being cheap, Granddad. She ain't say nothing about no damn 414 00:07:28,000 --> 00:07:29,000 MACKTASTIC: What's happening, nigga? 415 00:07:29,000 --> 00:07:30,000 I'll advance my belt on your behind 416 00:07:30,000 --> 00:07:31,000 if you don't shut your ass. Where the chicken wings and the doughnuts at? 417 00:07:31,000 --> 00:07:32,000 Oh, my God. You almost touched Miss von Hausen! 418 00:07:32,000 --> 00:07:33,000 What the fuck you got to eat in this bitch, nigga?! 419 00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:34,000 I didn't pay to get in the movie. MAN: Nah, you ain't crazy. 420 00:07:34,000 --> 00:07:35,000 I love you 421 00:07:35,000 --> 00:07:36,000 Uh, yes, we did. I -- I ordered my tickets online. Huey, what are we gonna do? 422 00:07:36,000 --> 00:07:37,000 It's just, I feel like this 423 00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:38,000 Who got the neck bones? You gonna tell her to get out. 424 00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:39,000 No, you didn't. I'm not telling her to leave. 425 00:07:39,000 --> 00:07:40,000 is coming to an end. 426 00:07:40,000 --> 00:07:41,000 We snuck in. She hit me with one of them exploding nutsack techniques. 427 00:07:41,000 --> 00:07:42,000 Ghostface Killah isn't even dead. 428 00:07:42,000 --> 00:07:43,000 We stole a movie. 429 00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:44,000 Now, who makes the rules? She's not a kung fu master. She's crazy. 430 00:07:44,000 --> 00:07:45,000 that goofy-looking motherfucker is coming back. 431 00:07:45,000 --> 00:07:46,000 Grownups, right? Shit. Then you go kick her ass out. 432 00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:47,000 Your granddad's nigga moment ain't dead yet. 433 00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:48,000 And I'm grown up, and I say it's okay. 434 00:07:48,000 --> 00:07:49,000 But what am I supposed to do? 435 00:07:49,000 --> 00:07:50,000 We're gonna get caught. Hey. I'm willing to stay in the bathroom all night. 436 00:07:50,000 --> 00:07:51,000 We're gonna get caught. If death can't stop Stinkmeaner, what can? 437 00:07:51,000 --> 00:07:52,000 I should call my daddy and turn myself in. 438 00:07:52,000 --> 00:07:53,000 Think about it. Peace. 439 00:07:53,000 --> 00:07:54,000 Oh, yeah? You gonna tell him You two just...stay here. 440 00:07:54,000 --> 00:07:55,000 -Shh-shh-Shh. 441 00:07:55,000 --> 00:07:56,000 what you came to see, huh? 442 00:07:56,000 --> 00:07:57,000 Okay. I gotta use the bathroom anyway. 443 00:07:57,000 --> 00:07:58,000 I bet he'd like to know that. 444 00:07:58,000 --> 00:07:59,000 What the hell going on out here? 445 00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:01,000 Maybe I should make a phone call. RUCKUS: Oh... 446 00:08:01,000 --> 00:08:02,000 No. Please, no. 447 00:08:02,000 --> 00:08:03,000 Good. Now just calm down. You must be crazy. You gotta let your thing go. 448 00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:04,000 RUCKUS: Mm-hm. 449 00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:05,000 Try some mashed potatoes. Who got the popcorn? 450 00:08:05,000 --> 00:08:06,000 ED: If you had a headset like mine, 451 00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:08,000 I do, Granddad. GRANDDAD: I ain't letting my stuff 452 00:08:08,000 --> 00:08:09,000 and some Johnny Mathis. 453 00:08:09,000 --> 00:08:10,000 WOMAN: So where's he at now? Nah, baby, I'm still here. 454 00:08:10,000 --> 00:08:11,000 Ow! Hey. 455 00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:12,000 What the hell is wrong with you? 456 00:08:12,000 --> 00:08:13,000 Watch it, boy, don't step on my roses. 457 00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:14,000 No. What am I gonna do with raw popcorn? 458 00:08:14,000 --> 00:08:15,000 VON HAUSEN: What was that? Let me call you back. 459 00:08:15,000 --> 00:08:16,000 You're gonna ruin my dentures. 460 00:08:16,000 --> 00:08:18,000 Whew. Damn, can't watch a movie without popcorn. Hey. How's Robert? Is everything okay? 461 00:08:18,000 --> 00:08:19,000 Heh. Word down at the gym is that he done wore 462 00:08:19,000 --> 00:08:20,000 Now I gotta spend all my damn money 463 00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:21,000 I gotta deal with 464 00:08:21,000 --> 00:08:22,000 on a bucket of popcorn. 465 00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:23,000 Now, it's date night and you know the rules. 466 00:08:23,000 --> 00:08:24,000 Hear that? Sounds like niggas. 467 00:08:24,000 --> 00:08:25,000 You get in that room. 468 00:08:25,000 --> 00:08:26,000 Told you. I don't care if you hear scream 469 00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:27,000 USHER: Thank you. It was really hard. 470 00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:28,000 RUCKUS: What you see, Miss von Hausen? 471 00:08:28,000 --> 00:08:29,000 When your feeling 472 00:08:29,000 --> 00:08:30,000 It's just...I had heard 473 00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:31,000 Shit, he -- he just hatin' 'cause, see, 474 00:08:31,000 --> 00:08:33,000 You gotta let it go 475 00:08:33,000 --> 00:08:34,000 Mm. Hm! 476 00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:35,000 WOMAN: Why don't you call her, then? 477 00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:36,000 Jumpin' like it used to Maybe you would like a demonstration? 478 00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:37,000 Oh, shit! 479 00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:38,000 Honey, I'm home. 480 00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:39,000 RUCKUS: Buck 'em down, Miss von Hausen! 481 00:08:39,000 --> 00:08:40,000 friendly sparring match? Let it burn 482 00:08:40,000 --> 00:08:42,000 We're takin' fire! Run! 483 00:08:42,000 --> 00:08:43,000 Oh, yeah! 484 00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:44,000 -RUCKUS: Get them negroes! -ED: They shootin'! 485 00:08:44,000 --> 00:08:45,000 It's best 486 00:08:45,000 --> 00:08:46,000 No, no, no, I'm still here. Yo, can I still come over? 487 00:08:46,000 --> 00:08:47,000 Tom, what's gotten into you? 488 00:08:47,000 --> 00:08:48,000 Of her being with someone-- 489 00:08:48,000 --> 00:08:49,000 Come on. You want some of this? Come on. 490 00:08:49,000 --> 00:08:50,000 Oh. Help me. 491 00:08:50,000 --> 00:08:51,000 MAN: Car! 492 00:08:51,000 --> 00:08:52,000 Oh, Tom! 493 00:08:52,000 --> 00:08:53,000 Get 'em, Miss von Hausen! 494 00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:54,000 That's the way! Wait, Miss von Hausen. 495 00:08:54,000 --> 00:08:55,000 I'm gonna make it do what it do. 496 00:08:55,000 --> 00:08:56,000 and I live across the street. I'll give you anything. Ah! 497 00:08:56,000 --> 00:08:57,000 SARAH: Oh, Tom! 498 00:08:57,000 --> 00:08:58,000 Come on, now! Buck 'em down! 499 00:08:58,000 --> 00:08:59,000 Yeah, that's my granddad. 500 00:08:59,000 --> 00:09:00,000 RUMMY: Riley! Hey, Riley, look, man, 501 00:09:00,000 --> 00:09:02,000 ANNOUNCER: Don't steal movies. 502 00:09:02,000 --> 00:09:03,000 I need somewhere to hide. Niggas are shootin', man. Let's... 503 00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:04,000 Niggas are shootin'? ED: Hey! get out while we can. 504 00:09:04,000 --> 00:09:05,000 This the car that got pimped out by Xzibit. 505 00:09:05,000 --> 00:09:06,000 I just wanna say that I like your music. 506 00:09:06,000 --> 00:09:07,000 Say, motherfucker, you on the phone or you talking to me? 507 00:09:07,000 --> 00:09:08,000 And, uh, you know, this is my turf over here, 508 00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:09,000 Hello? 509 00:09:09,000 --> 00:09:10,000 I'm talkin' to Riley. 510 00:09:10,000 --> 00:09:11,000 SARAH: It's Sarah. 511 00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:13,000 GRANDDAD: Damn. Hey, y'all see the new rims I got on my bike? 512 00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:14,000 come into my house and try to destroy my place. Large freshly popped popcorn, please. And lots of butter. This thing has a push-button starter like a racecar. 513 00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:15,000 I ain't on your nuts, though. 514 00:09:15,000 --> 00:09:17,000 to her recital practice at 3, right? 515 00:09:17,000 --> 00:09:18,000 Anything else? 516 00:09:18,000 --> 00:09:19,000 Yes. 517 00:09:19,000 --> 00:09:20,000 I asked for butter on it. Oh, man. Respect, little partner. 518 00:09:20,000 --> 00:09:21,000 Butter's over there. Well, I'm in the studio with Snoop Doggy Dogg 519 00:09:21,000 --> 00:09:22,000 Hey, this little nigga's all right, y'all. 520 00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:23,000 Are you doing the music video thing again? 521 00:09:23,000 --> 00:09:24,000 I don't wanna put the butter on it. Why can't you do it? No-ho-ho-ho. Lionel Richie's ex-wife. 522 00:09:24,000 --> 00:09:25,000 Whoa, whoa! What y'all doin'? off the table. 523 00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:26,000 Gotta go, honey. Bye. 524 00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:27,000 You're supposed to put the butter on it. You know your mama taught you better than that, 525 00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:28,000 I don't wanna put the butter on it. ghetto-ass nigga. 526 00:09:28,000 --> 00:09:29,000 I'm already paying $20 for this bullshit popcorn. 527 00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:30,000 I'm still burnin' and Brenda Richie had just caught Lionel in bed 528 00:09:30,000 --> 00:09:31,000 But how about, uh, tomorrow, cutie pie? 529 00:09:31,000 --> 00:09:32,000 I will not demean myself Y'all can't take my granddad's car. 530 00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:33,000 ...in the Jacuzzi? by putting butter on popcorn. 531 00:09:33,000 --> 00:09:34,000 Stop, Ed. 532 00:09:34,000 --> 00:09:35,000 Why? It's really easy. Why? 533 00:09:35,000 --> 00:09:36,000 Don't want to STINKMEANER: Ha! 534 00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:37,000 Because I don't work at the movie theater, that's why. 535 00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:38,000 What the--? 536 00:09:39,000 --> 00:09:40,000 You're supposed to put the butter on it. Who's out there? Boys! Boys, help me. 537 00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:41,000 LIONEL: Don't-- Hyah! 538 00:09:41,000 --> 00:09:42,000 If I go to Burger King and order a cheeseburger, 539 00:09:42,000 --> 00:09:43,000 Bruise you Ow! 540 00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:44,000 they don't make me put the cheese on it, do 541 00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:45,000 Let it burn 542 00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:46,000 I see, I see. Just 'cause your skin is light, bright, 543 00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:47,000 Let it burn So then I say to R. Kelly, 544 00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:48,000 Gotta let it burn 545 00:09:48,000 --> 00:09:50,000 and two shades from being white, "Did you wash your hands?" 546 00:09:50,000 --> 00:09:51,000 Hey, for real? On the real? you think you too good to butter your own popcorn. ass whipping. 547 00:09:51,000 --> 00:09:52,000 Yo, this little nigga funny, man. 548 00:09:52,000 --> 00:09:53,000 Oh 549 00:09:53,000 --> 00:09:54,000 This little nigga like Well, you wrong, Lando Calrissian. 550 00:09:54,000 --> 00:09:55,000 Charlie Murphy or some shit, man. 551 00:09:55,000 --> 00:09:56,000 Oh, sweet Jesus! Hey, man. This your brother? 552 00:09:56,000 --> 00:09:57,000 Damn it, Ruckus. Y'all gonna put some butter on this popcorn. 553 00:09:57,000 --> 00:09:58,000 It's burning. Upside his nose. Oh, Lordy Lord. 554 00:09:58,000 --> 00:09:59,000 Yo, nigga. Your brother told us 555 00:09:59,000 --> 00:10:00,000 VON HAUSEN: He saw it! He saw everything. 556 00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:01,000 how you be all into reading and shit. 557 00:10:01,000 --> 00:10:02,000 Hey, Tom. Shut the fuck up. 558 00:10:02,000 --> 00:10:03,000 Hyah! Tom, go away! I'm gonna call the police. 559 00:10:03,000 --> 00:10:04,000 GRANDDAD: Boy, watch your mouth. 560 00:10:04,000 --> 00:10:05,000 Did you hear that? 561 00:10:05,000 --> 00:10:06,000 We put our lives on the line every day to make movies, GRANDDAD: Oh, it was terrible. Terrible. 562 00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:07,000 Man, I can't hear nothing over Granddad's gay-ass music. 563 00:10:07,000 --> 00:10:08,000 Damn it. Hurry up, boy. Tell us who did it. 564 00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:09,000 Now, you're gonna tell me who stole my car and then people come along and steal all that hard work. 565 00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:10,000 Look out, new message. 566 00:10:10,000 --> 00:10:11,000 or I'm gonna get my belt or a 2x4 and go upside your head! 567 00:10:11,000 --> 00:10:12,000 Who would do something like that? Brenda Richie knew kung fu. 568 00:10:12,000 --> 00:10:13,000 Word. You know what I mean? You know, that reading shit, 569 00:10:13,000 --> 00:10:14,000 A terrible, awful human being that no one will ever love. 570 00:10:14,000 --> 00:10:15,000 you know what I mean, it's hard, son. 571 00:10:15,000 --> 00:10:16,000 Could be worse. 572 00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:17,000 That's who. Word. You know what I mean? Word. 573 00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:19,000 You know what I mean? Especially when them books be I'm so sorry, Mr. Stuntman. 574 00:10:19,000 --> 00:10:20,000 I pays for my car! you know what I mean, you know, 575 00:10:20,000 --> 00:10:21,000 really thick and heavy-like, you know what I mean? 576 00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:22,000 Thank you for that perspective, Huey. I ain't getting it for him neither. Nope. 577 00:10:22,000 --> 00:10:23,000 Word. You know what I mean? 578 00:10:23,000 --> 00:10:24,000 Hey. Get to the flick. 579 00:10:24,000 --> 00:10:25,000 No problem. Why would he send a message from--? I say make a man wait until he's resentful. 580 00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:26,000 What happened to the movies? This doesn't seem to be a place for kids. 581 00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:27,000 Y'all should be ashamed. In the street. What streets? 582 00:10:27,000 --> 00:10:28,000 That always works. What the hell? Tom, what's going on? 583 00:10:28,000 --> 00:10:29,000 Why is it when I order a soda pop, We got PlayStation and Xbox, nigga. 584 00:10:29,000 --> 00:10:30,000 I get a empty cup? Think it's gonna be weird now that I beat up his grandson? 585 00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:31,000 I didn't order a empty cup. Mm-mm. I can't do it, Granddad. I can't talk to the po-po. 586 00:10:31,000 --> 00:10:32,000 And we got Incredible Hulks, nigga. 587 00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:33,000 I ordered a soda pop. 588 00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:35,000 And what asshole started putting commercials in movies? Tell Granddad. He's not the police. All the kids is welcome, motherfucker. 589 00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:36,000 I can see commercials at home on TV. STINKMEANER: Oh, you running? Okay. Let's hear the story one more time. 590 00:10:36,000 --> 00:10:37,000 So this is the message you want to send 591 00:10:37,000 --> 00:10:38,000 Okay, let me get this right, now. And the bathroom stink. Clean the fucking bathroom! 592 00:10:38,000 --> 00:10:39,000 You promise not to tell? My cousin, Elliot, in California 593 00:10:39,000 --> 00:10:40,000 to the young youth out here like myself Oh, my goodness, some black people are crazy. 594 00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:41,000 I'm not gonna take it anymore! passed away very suddenly while working out. 595 00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:42,000 Get your drunk ass outta here. I pay too much damn money for these movie tickets 596 00:10:42,000 --> 00:10:43,000 and not love these ho's, huh? 597 00:10:43,000 --> 00:10:44,000 W-w-w-what's all this? Oh! Ahhh! 598 00:10:44,000 --> 00:10:45,000 to butter my own motherfucking popcorn! 599 00:10:45,000 --> 00:10:46,000 Is this what's hot right now in the streets? 600 00:10:46,000 --> 00:10:47,000 Goodness gracious to life. 601 00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:48,000 Yeah, let's say that. We weren't very close. It's only popcorn. How am I gonna get my butter beans? 602 00:10:48,000 --> 00:10:49,000 Tom, what's wrong with you? 603 00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:50,000 All for some white girl who left you for an RandB dancing-ass, 604 00:10:50,000 --> 00:10:51,000 You on that stuff? Snap out of it, Tom. 605 00:10:51,000 --> 00:10:52,000 sexy-flexy- ass nigga? Uh, yeah. 606 00:10:52,000 --> 00:10:53,000 When did you get here? Cocaine's a hell of a drug. 607 00:10:53,000 --> 00:10:54,000 Huh? 911 emergency. I'll hold. 608 00:10:54,000 --> 00:10:55,000 I'm sorry. 609 00:10:55,000 --> 00:10:57,000 Well, I been at the ticket window all day long, that's why Daddy is Uh, okay. 610 00:10:57,000 --> 00:10:58,000 and I don't remember you buying no ticket, Don't snitch, Granddad. 611 00:10:58,000 --> 00:10:59,000 Under no circumstances do you change that story. 612 00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:01,000 Robert Freeman. They don't know nothin' unless you tell 'em. 613 00:11:01,000 --> 00:11:02,000 Uh, I-I-I got my tickets online. 614 00:11:02,000 --> 00:11:03,000 Aha! A damn lie. GRANDDAD: Damn it! Damn it. Come here. 615 00:11:03,000 --> 00:11:04,000 "Ahhh" ain't my name. 616 00:11:04,000 --> 00:11:06,000 I ain't never met a nigga MAN: Sir, please release the child. people walking around 617 00:11:06,000 --> 00:11:08,000 smart enough to use a personal computer. Release the child. TOM: You're choking him out! where they don't want them to be, 618 00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:09,000 Not even a Macintosh. eating outside 619 00:11:09,000 --> 00:11:10,000 HUEY: Stinkmeaner. 620 00:11:10,000 --> 00:11:11,000 being the driving force Uh... when they think they should be inside at a table. 621 00:11:11,000 --> 00:11:12,000 behind the "stop snitching" movement, Today is Fidel Castro's birthday. 622 00:11:12,000 --> 00:11:13,000 You'll never take me alive, you punk-asses. 623 00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:14,000 Oh. Are you sure? And I'm in charge of the birthday party. 624 00:11:14,000 --> 00:11:15,000 RUCKUS: Stop him! 625 00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:16,000 Come on, come on. So I gotta fly out there. 626 00:11:16,000 --> 00:11:17,000 You filed a complaint against me, old man?! He went this-a way. In 2000, rapper Gangstalicious reportedly assaulted 627 00:11:17,000 --> 00:11:18,000 I mean, you like it here, don't you, Daddy? 628 00:11:18,000 --> 00:11:19,000 You filed a complaint against Thugnificent? 629 00:11:19,000 --> 00:11:20,000 This is a... And I'm taking y'all with me 630 00:11:20,000 --> 00:11:21,000 with a tennis racket 631 00:11:21,000 --> 00:11:22,000 Mm-hmm. in the first-class cabin on the ass-whupping express. 632 00:11:22,000 --> 00:11:23,000 and a bottle of Hennessy on the set of a music video. for Fidel Castro's birthday party that I'm planning, 633 00:11:23,000 --> 00:11:24,000 I don't know what we're gonna do, but we gotta do-- Rap beef, nigga. Punk-ass motherfucker. 634 00:11:24,000 --> 00:11:25,000 Whew. Did I miss anything? 635 00:11:25,000 --> 00:11:26,000 Mr. Freeman... Guinness refused to cooperate with authorities. like I said earlier. Eh-heh. Yeah. 636 00:11:26,000 --> 00:11:27,000 I don't wanna steal the movie. 637 00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:28,000 Guys. I just wanted to thank you 638 00:11:28,000 --> 00:11:29,000 I wanna go home! Wow. 639 00:11:29,000 --> 00:11:30,000 Yeah. Shh! 640 00:11:30,000 --> 00:11:31,000 for letting me stay here. I thought you were gonna tell me you thought I was crazy, 641 00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:32,000 What's wrong with you? and you didn't want to see me again, like the others. 642 00:11:32,000 --> 00:11:33,000 I wanna go home. 643 00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:34,000 Not at all, Tom. 644 00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:36,000 You wasn't saying that back at the house, was you? Drop the beat, drop the beat, ugh. 645 00:11:36,000 --> 00:11:37,000 Bring it on, Huey. Was you? Because you wanted to see Soul Plane 2. 646 00:11:37,000 --> 00:11:38,000 I'm enjoying this time with you. Are you kidding? 647 00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:39,000 mmm, delicious 648 00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:41,000 Well, this is how we see Soul Plane 2. Thugnificent's rags-to-bitches story 649 00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:42,000 no doubt we gonna win this In fact, I was just telling Huey I repeat, the terrorist said his name is Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, 650 00:11:42,000 --> 00:11:43,000 Ooh. I got an idea. 651 00:11:43,000 --> 00:11:45,000 I smacked Johnny Guinness I would love to pursue a romantic relationship you. 652 00:11:45,000 --> 00:11:46,000 and he's demanding that we -- in the super-elite suburb of Woodcrest. 653 00:11:46,000 --> 00:11:47,000 Tom. Get down here. Definitely. I'll call you 654 00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:48,000 Hell, no, I ain't fitting to ask him 655 00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:49,000 Several of the neighborhood's black residents for his motherfucking autograph. STINKMEANER: Whoo, come on. 656 00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:50,000 filed a complaint 657 00:11:50,000 --> 00:11:51,000 HUEY: An hour into the movie, 658 00:11:51,000 --> 00:11:53,000 And Fidel. I wasn't sure how much more I could take. 659 00:11:53,000 --> 00:11:54,000 MAN: We out of food, but we got 660 00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:55,000 Let me ask you something. 661 00:11:55,000 --> 00:11:56,000 How did it make you feel 662 00:11:56,000 --> 00:11:57,000 Yo. Look out. 663 00:11:57,000 --> 00:11:58,000 Pass this bag of potato chips around. knowing that this neighborhood's black residents 664 00:11:58,000 --> 00:11:59,000 Tom was facing an all-out revolt. 665 00:11:59,000 --> 00:12:00,000 didn't want you here? Please take one. Pass it... 666 00:12:00,000 --> 00:12:01,000 TOM: Please, people! Riley Freeman will talk. 667 00:12:01,000 --> 00:12:02,000 He's in here. I know Robert. 668 00:12:02,000 --> 00:12:03,000 To be stabbed in the back by your own people? 669 00:12:03,000 --> 00:12:04,000 He don't miss a coon flick. 670 00:12:04,000 --> 00:12:05,000 And this, sir, is an intervention. ALL: Bye. 671 00:12:05,000 --> 00:12:06,000 What is it? What's happening? 672 00:12:06,000 --> 00:12:07,000 An intervention? Your friends have Superb, homey. Exemplary. Maybe about 30 years. 673 00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:08,000 Shh. Don't make a sound. 674 00:12:08,000 --> 00:12:09,000 I feel sorry for 'em, though, 675 00:12:09,000 --> 00:12:10,000 from chronic bitch dependency, Mr. DuBois. To no more weekend visits by crazy Internet women. 676 00:12:10,000 --> 00:12:11,000 STINKMEANER: All right, here we go. 677 00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:12,000 May I call you Tom? where they came from. 678 00:12:12,000 --> 00:12:13,000 Is this some kind of joke? 679 00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:14,000 I promise you, Riley will talk soon. You don't know where I came from. 680 00:12:14,000 --> 00:12:15,000 Tom...bitch dependency 681 00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:16,000 : Ooh. Damn. I'm from a small town called 682 00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:17,000 is no laughing matter. with the Fidel Castro story. 683 00:12:17,000 --> 00:12:18,000 Let's go check Madea's Bat Mitzvah. 684 00:12:18,000 --> 00:12:19,000 Addiction to a bitch can fuck with your friends, Get your bars up, nigga. 685 00:12:19,000 --> 00:12:20,000 MAN: Attention, please, passengers. Hey. Put that camera back over here. 686 00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:21,000 your health, and scary enough, even your money. 687 00:12:21,000 --> 00:12:22,000 your granddaddy is a master of deception. If you left the toilet seat up in the restroom... 688 00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:23,000 ...faggot boy. 689 00:12:23,000 --> 00:12:24,000 It's a disease, Tom. : Fidel Castro's birthday? 690 00:12:24,000 --> 00:12:25,000 MAN: Yeah, that's what I'm talkin' about! 691 00:12:25,000 --> 00:12:27,000 Wait. What was your name again? 692 00:12:27,000 --> 00:12:28,000 Well, thank you for asking. GRANDDAD: Yeah! You think he was lying? 693 00:12:28,000 --> 00:12:29,000 Officer, I'm sorry. STINKMEANER: Whoa! Yeah, I got you now. All I know is you drove all them hours 694 00:12:29,000 --> 00:12:30,000 I didn't mean to steal from the stuntman. 695 00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:31,000 Get off me, you bitch ass, you faggot ass! 696 00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:32,000 Wait. "A pimp"? MACKTASTIC: Eat a sack of baby dicks, 697 00:12:32,000 --> 00:12:33,000 Named Slickback. 698 00:12:33,000 --> 00:12:34,000 was withholding information. 699 00:12:34,000 --> 00:12:35,000 Yes. Please say the whole thing if you would. 700 00:12:35,000 --> 00:12:36,000 GRANDDAD: Not the lamp. No. 701 00:12:36,000 --> 00:12:37,000 What were you about to do? 702 00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:38,000 You were about to rat on us, weren't you? Alright, let's get into something brand new, 703 00:12:38,000 --> 00:12:39,000 This is what the movie theater industry wants, Jazmine. 704 00:12:39,000 --> 00:12:40,000 Yes, Tom. Every time. 705 00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:41,000 STINKMEANER: I'm a-kill you. 706 00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:42,000 Us fighting against each other. that's my boy, my friend, Thugnificent. 707 00:12:42,000 --> 00:12:43,000 You beat me in the parking lot. 708 00:12:43,000 --> 00:12:44,000 You're right. Now, you listen here, you little bitch. Oh-ho-ho-ho, no. There's no turning back now. 709 00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:45,000 I-I don't think I need any help And just so you know, 710 00:12:45,000 --> 00:12:46,000 I'm gonna ask you some real simple questions, 711 00:12:46,000 --> 00:12:47,000 You're in it all the way. STINKMEANER: I want my parking space. 712 00:12:47,000 --> 00:12:48,000 and I want some real simple answers. 713 00:12:48,000 --> 00:12:49,000 Now you're gonna get your little narrow, high-yellow ass It isn't until August 13th. 714 00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:50,000 And by 715 00:12:50,000 --> 00:12:51,000 back into the theater and enjoy Soul Plane 2. Now, you pulled into the garage and went into the house at 9:15? 716 00:12:51,000 --> 00:12:52,000 you mean a pimp? 717 00:12:52,000 --> 00:12:53,000 And it's got my main man, 718 00:12:53,000 --> 00:12:54,000 Nate "Doggity" Dogg, on the hook. I...wanna...go...home! 719 00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:55,000 Uh, look, I'm not trying to insult you. 720 00:12:55,000 --> 00:12:56,000 He lied to me. If I'm not mistaken, it was 9:15. motherfucker. 721 00:12:56,000 --> 00:12:57,000 Shut up. Mm-hm. You see, girl? 722 00:12:57,000 --> 00:12:58,000 You're ruining my innocence! 723 00:12:58,000 --> 00:12:59,000 Shut up. So you pulled into the garage 724 00:12:59,000 --> 00:13:00,000 That's why I'm by myself. 725 00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:01,000 MAN: I expected to fly first-class. 726 00:13:01,000 --> 00:13:02,000 and went into the house at 9:15? 727 00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:03,000 I wanna go home. You better not get rid of it. 728 00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:05,000 MAN 2: Well, you ain't in first class. 729 00:13:05,000 --> 00:13:07,000 Why we gotta put the nigga in my bed? You don't see me running around lookin' for a bitch. 730 00:13:07,000 --> 00:13:08,000 then she must be nutty as squirrel shit. I looked at my watch, and -- and, yes, mm-hm, mm, 9:15. 731 00:13:08,000 --> 00:13:09,000 I know where all my bitches are, 732 00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:11,000 Look at this. He's possessed by the ghost of Stinkmeaner. 733 00:13:11,000 --> 00:13:12,000 So you're telling me, definitely, Granddad. What's wrong with Jazmine? And by everything else, I mean her looks. She was fine. 734 00:13:12,000 --> 00:13:13,000 that you pulled into the garage 735 00:13:13,000 --> 00:13:14,000 Boy, don't nobody listen to you. : I'm out here 736 00:13:14,000 --> 00:13:15,000 She couldn't look that good. She was black. and went into the house at 8:15? 737 00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:16,000 She's fine. Watch the movie. 738 00:13:16,000 --> 00:13:17,000 That's what the hell I thought. But I guess if you put lipstick and a wig on a monkey, 739 00:13:17,000 --> 00:13:18,000 Thank you, Grandma. What if he pees in the bed or vomit, or shoots a deuce? 740 00:13:18,000 --> 00:13:19,000 Oh, that's crazy. 741 00:13:19,000 --> 00:13:21,000 Now look at you: bitchless. it could look good too. 742 00:13:21,000 --> 00:13:22,000 Look at this. I...wanna...go...home. 743 00:13:22,000 --> 00:13:23,000 Now, you see something. You know you done fucked up, right? 744 00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:24,000 HUEY: Granddad had to be stopped. 745 00:13:24,000 --> 00:13:25,000 I've had enough. I'm going back upstairs. A monkey in lipstick and a wig. 746 00:13:25,000 --> 00:13:26,000 Tom is possessed by an evil spirit 747 00:13:26,000 --> 00:13:27,000 I'm gonna put an end to this... GRANDDAD: No! I said, no. 748 00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:28,000 Tom, when we first let you stay here, 749 00:13:28,000 --> 00:13:29,000 LUNA: I found him. or die trying. 750 00:13:29,000 --> 00:13:30,000 He's in a park with another man. I said I pulled into the garage at -- 751 00:13:30,000 --> 00:13:31,000 HUEY: And so did this movie. 752 00:13:31,000 --> 00:13:33,000 WOMAN: Ooh, see. What did I tell you? 753 00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:34,000 Fortunately, I thought of a way to do both. See? That's exactly why I don't have a man. 754 00:13:34,000 --> 00:13:35,000 You know you done fucked up, right? 755 00:13:35,000 --> 00:13:37,000 It's only been two days. Coming. 756 00:13:37,000 --> 00:13:38,000 Nigga, hush. You're living under my roof now. 757 00:13:38,000 --> 00:13:39,000 Move, nigga. 758 00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:40,000 Where you going? They're looking for us. But without Riley talking, the cops had nothing, 759 00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:41,000 You know what? I know a great therapist. 760 00:13:41,000 --> 00:13:42,000 Huey, come back. 761 00:13:42,000 --> 00:13:44,000 I'll make an appointment today. It's all that stuff they do to their hair. 762 00:13:44,000 --> 00:13:45,000 That... 763 00:13:45,000 --> 00:13:46,000 Oh, this is crazy. Colored folks are something. RILEY: I know y'all seen niggas with spinning rims, right? 764 00:13:46,000 --> 00:13:47,000 Well, hello, cutie pie. 765 00:13:47,000 --> 00:13:48,000 But check it, check it, check it. 766 00:13:48,000 --> 00:13:49,000 we've already paid Mr. A Pimp Named Slickback 767 00:13:49,000 --> 00:13:50,000 I'm sayin', on a bike, though. 768 00:13:50,000 --> 00:13:51,000 Well, hello. 769 00:13:51,000 --> 00:13:52,000 a retainer of $2500. I don't think his friend likes the sisters too much. 770 00:13:52,000 --> 00:13:53,000 HUEY: My plan was to get to the projector room 771 00:13:53,000 --> 00:13:54,000 Robert, you shouldn't have. WOMAN: Ha! Heh. Oh-- Oh! 772 00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:55,000 and destroy the print of Soul Plane. 773 00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:56,000 With your credit card. 774 00:13:57,000 --> 00:13:58,000 That's exactly why I don't have a man now. Oh. 775 00:13:58,000 --> 00:13:59,000 Man, niggas... Somebody get me out of here. 776 00:13:59,000 --> 00:14:00,000 I was rushing, and-- A PIMP NAMED SLICKBACK: Did you know 777 00:14:00,000 --> 00:14:01,000 Oh, I think men who are comfortable with their bodies 778 00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:02,000 Heh-heh. They just mad... 779 00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:03,000 Me too, baby. First, I had to go to the bathroom. 780 00:14:03,000 --> 00:14:04,000 with a genetic predisposition are very sexy, 781 00:14:04,000 --> 00:14:05,000 Oh, well. At least I got that crazy bitch out of my house. 782 00:14:05,000 --> 00:14:06,000 RILEY: I be like, ugh! Ugh! 783 00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:07,000 to bitch dependency, Tom? 784 00:14:07,000 --> 00:14:08,000 One problem black people have with snitching 785 00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:09,000 And exactly when did you become a relationship counselor? What did he say? 786 00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:10,000 Jazmine, you're missing all the best parts. 787 00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:11,000 Well, sharing this pimp knowledge He told his friend I'm crazy. 788 00:14:11,000 --> 00:14:12,000 I'm not watching a stolen movie. And I like to cook, mostly pork. 789 00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:13,000 for an exorbitant fee is my way of giving 790 00:14:13,000 --> 00:14:14,000 Oh, well. If you don't wanna laugh. 791 00:14:14,000 --> 00:14:15,000 something back to the community, Tom. 792 00:14:15,000 --> 00:14:16,000 I like to clean too. Wow. 793 00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:17,000 I want to help you, Tom. I do. 794 00:14:17,000 --> 00:14:18,000 You know what you should do? Oh, that's crazy. What's so funny? 795 00:14:18,000 --> 00:14:19,000 But I need you to help me... 796 00:14:19,000 --> 00:14:20,000 Oh, nothing. Hilarity just ensued, that's all. 797 00:14:20,000 --> 00:14:21,000 No. 798 00:14:21,000 --> 00:14:22,000 It did? Yeah, that's more the feds' thing. 799 00:14:22,000 --> 00:14:23,000 Huh. 800 00:14:23,000 --> 00:14:24,000 "Help me help you." Yeah, okay. 801 00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:25,000 You see anything weird, you just give us a call, 802 00:14:25,000 --> 00:14:26,000 Oh. Oh. Oh! Robert Freeman! 803 00:14:26,000 --> 00:14:27,000 all right, buddy? Heh. Okay. 804 00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:28,000 That was funny. 805 00:14:28,000 --> 00:14:29,000 Darling, all the women of my cultu-- 806 00:14:29,000 --> 00:14:30,000 MAN: Hey, Bernard! You snitch-ass motherfucker! 807 00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:31,000 Hm? Ah. STINKMEANER: Come here and fight like a man, 808 00:14:31,000 --> 00:14:32,000 Granddad, you home? 809 00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:34,000 Say it. "Bitch." Yeah. Bitch. 810 00:14:34,000 --> 00:14:35,000 Uh, yes, we've gotta call her that, Tom. I don't hear anything. Hey. Where's Granddad? 811 00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:36,000 RUCKUS: It's about impossible 812 00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:37,000 I'm sorry. After what she's done, STINKMEANER: I know you hear me, Robert! 813 00:14:37,000 --> 00:14:38,000 in this dark theater. 814 00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:39,000 not callin' her a bitch would be disrespectful to you. Man, tell me you didn't think that was hot. 815 00:14:39,000 --> 00:14:40,000 Yo. I think we need to shake the spizzot. 816 00:14:40,000 --> 00:14:41,000 I will not be ignored! Got a possessed nigga here, 817 00:14:41,000 --> 00:14:42,000 he was charged with conspiracy Huh? What? 818 00:14:42,000 --> 00:14:43,000 Now please continue, Tom. You gonna hate on it 819 00:14:43,000 --> 00:14:44,000 and sentenced to a month in jail. 820 00:14:44,000 --> 00:14:45,000 Well, my wife, Sarah-- 821 00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:46,000 GRANDDAD: Can't believe these little, young kids You need to stop with the hate crimes, granddad. 822 00:14:46,000 --> 00:14:47,000 I mean-- She's the best woman in the world. 823 00:14:47,000 --> 00:14:48,000 Forget Jazmine. Let's go. But we couldn't. 824 00:14:48,000 --> 00:14:49,000 Did you tell her that you got two sets of genitals? 825 00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:50,000 That was that nigga from Friday, She the weak link. She'll slow us down. 826 00:14:50,000 --> 00:14:51,000 We've had a great life together until now. I just want to have a friendly chat 827 00:14:51,000 --> 00:14:52,000 I mean, how could we? Look, she a little girl. A vagina and a coochie. Oh, that's a conjunction. 828 00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:53,000 gonna drink me a Red Bull, then I'm gonna wake up 829 00:14:53,000 --> 00:14:54,000 before this gets outta hand. 830 00:14:54,000 --> 00:14:55,000 They're not gonna give her no real time. You know what? Fuck them. 831 00:14:55,000 --> 00:14:56,000 She do what? A couple months, tops. 832 00:14:56,000 --> 00:14:57,000 They can make all the silly little videos they want. I did everything I could, but if Riley doesn't talk, 833 00:14:57,000 --> 00:14:58,000 But we both got priors. We gots to go. 834 00:14:58,000 --> 00:14:59,000 Oh-- Oh, that? That's just the television. 835 00:14:59,000 --> 00:15:00,000 they're both gonna be charged tomorrow. 836 00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:02,000 Come on, Granddad. We running out of time. they'll be out of the neighborhood. 837 00:15:02,000 --> 00:15:03,000 Sometimes, This is real talk, nigga. 838 00:15:03,000 --> 00:15:04,000 Yes, she is 839 00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:05,000 in order to save the day, 840 00:15:05,000 --> 00:15:06,000 people have to sacrifice themselves, 841 00:15:06,000 --> 00:15:07,000 What the hell is wrong with you? This ain't a movie, Riley. 842 00:15:07,000 --> 00:15:08,000 you know what I'm saying? 843 00:15:09,000 --> 00:15:10,000 You and Granddad about to go to jail. 844 00:15:10,000 --> 00:15:12,000 Oh, Air Marshal 50 Cent. GRANDDAD: Wait, no. That's just the TV. 845 00:15:12,000 --> 00:15:13,000 You're so brave It's not the fact that you obviously have a man 846 00:15:13,000 --> 00:15:14,000 to sacrifice yourself to save us. 847 00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:15,000 I tried to stop 'em! 848 00:15:15,000 --> 00:15:16,000 possessed by an evil spirit strapped to a bed upstairs. 849 00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:17,000 Not me, bitch. You. 850 00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:18,000 Oh! Wait! Oh. Oh. 851 00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:20,000 Shh. It's not? No. 852 00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:21,000 Just go to sleep. It's the fact that you lied about it. 853 00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:22,000 M-May I sit down over there next to Riley? 854 00:15:22,000 --> 00:15:23,000 A PIMP NAMED SLICKBACK: It sounds to me, Tom, 855 00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:24,000 Huh? 856 00:15:24,000 --> 00:15:25,000 like some of the passion 857 00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:27,000 has gone out of your marriage. STINKMEANER: You better leave. 858 00:15:27,000 --> 00:15:28,000 Hey. Hold this. We be right back. 859 00:15:28,000 --> 00:15:29,000 And turns out they're not so bad. : You've reached 860 00:15:29,000 --> 00:15:30,000 Okay. Why did you lie to me, Robert? 861 00:15:30,000 --> 00:15:31,000 It's a normal thing in long-term relationships. 862 00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:32,000 of the Catholic Church. 863 00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:33,000 If you know, you can tell me. I won't tell anybody. 864 00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:34,000 Uh, what lie? Exactly. See, what Marx is saying If you would like to report sexual abuse-- 865 00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:35,000 You know what lie. 866 00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:36,000 is that the oppression of the proletariat But, Tom. I thought we were in this together. 867 00:15:36,000 --> 00:15:37,000 Damn, there's got to be somebody we can call for an exorcism. 868 00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:38,000 is an essential facet of the exploitation Jazmine, are you wearing a wire? 869 00:15:38,000 --> 00:15:39,000 STINKMEANER: You is a bitch! 870 00:15:39,000 --> 00:15:40,000 inherent in the system. Look, everybody lies. 871 00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:41,000 So therefore, due to the class -- 872 00:15:41,000 --> 00:15:42,000 Me, too. 873 00:15:42,000 --> 00:15:43,000 What the hell is this, a snitch-athon? 874 00:15:43,000 --> 00:15:44,000 It means they care enough to spare my feelings. 875 00:15:44,000 --> 00:15:46,000 Man, there's snitches everywhere. 876 00:15:46,000 --> 00:15:48,000 You little half-and-half. This is... really uncomfortable, 877 00:15:48,000 --> 00:15:49,000 Is that what you think? 878 00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:50,000 so I'm just gonna mosey. 879 00:15:50,000 --> 00:15:52,000 Did you know that at least 75 percent of bitches 880 00:15:52,000 --> 00:15:53,000 Hey there, boys. 881 00:15:53,000 --> 00:15:54,000 suffer from some kind of hearing loss? Uh... 882 00:15:54,000 --> 00:15:55,000 I came as fast as I could. 883 00:15:55,000 --> 00:15:56,000 This alarming statistic means that more likely than not, 884 00:15:56,000 --> 00:15:57,000 Ooh, this is uncomfortable. 885 00:15:57,000 --> 00:15:58,000 So this is the plan... Uncle Ruckus. 886 00:15:58,000 --> 00:15:59,000 HUEY: Oh, man. 887 00:15:59,000 --> 00:16:01,000 RUCKUS: Let's get this party started. 888 00:16:01,000 --> 00:16:02,000 to communicate with a bitch. Hello? 889 00:16:02,000 --> 00:16:03,000 STINKMEANER: Yeah. I got him. He's in there. 890 00:16:03,000 --> 00:16:04,000 You got bad credit, Robert! Now, remember, none of this was your fault. 891 00:16:04,000 --> 00:16:05,000 Whoa. What? 892 00:16:05,000 --> 00:16:06,000 What--? What happened to my--? RUCKUS: Removing an evil-nigga spirit 893 00:16:06,000 --> 00:16:07,000 Yeah, the problem is, we don't live in the future, Ed. This man took your weekend from you. 894 00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:08,000 If she say, "No," hit the bitch. Simple. 895 00:16:08,000 --> 00:16:09,000 We live in the present. You talking about the granddad from the Thugnificent song? 896 00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:10,000 But I-- I couldn't hit Sarah. 897 00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:11,000 You gotta kill him. 898 00:16:11,000 --> 00:16:12,000 Oh-ho, shit. Damn. It's not a cybernetic ear. It's a fuckin' cellphone headset. 899 00:16:12,000 --> 00:16:13,000 Has not hittin' a bitch been working? 900 00:16:13,000 --> 00:16:15,000 He's right there! has given us to fight niggas. 901 00:16:15,000 --> 00:16:16,000 I mean, scientifically speaking, A whip, a noose, a nightstick, a branding iron. 902 00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:17,000 has not hittin' the bitch achieved the desired results? 903 00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:18,000 Man, how'd it go? How'd that go? Hey! 904 00:16:18,000 --> 00:16:19,000 'cause your ass is old 905 00:16:19,000 --> 00:16:20,000 No way. I just-- 906 00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:21,000 Have you seen that shit in the mirror? It's Tom. 907 00:16:21,000 --> 00:16:22,000 I-- I-I can't. I-- I couldn't. 908 00:16:22,000 --> 00:16:23,000 You look like you're going to a fuckin' comic-book convention. 909 00:16:23,000 --> 00:16:24,000 Tom. I won't. Right on time. 910 00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:25,000 Tom, Take a deep breath. 911 00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:26,000 See, I'm gonna make my own rap It's okay. People have phobias. 912 00:16:26,000 --> 00:16:28,000 STINKMEANER: You ain't right, Robert. 913 00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:29,000 GUARD: Yeah. RUCKUS: The nigga will lie. Hey, yo. You never gonna guess who on the phone. 914 00:16:29,000 --> 00:16:30,000 Hold up, hold up. I'm getting a call. 915 00:16:30,000 --> 00:16:31,000 you can't go upside a bitch's head. 916 00:16:31,000 --> 00:16:32,000 And did you know that fool parked cars on my yard? Yeah. What's good, baby? 917 00:16:32,000 --> 00:16:33,000 Okay. We can beat this. 918 00:16:33,000 --> 00:16:34,000 I'm gonna rap about that, too. 919 00:16:34,000 --> 00:16:35,000 I will butt-rape your grandfather Tom, this is my bottom bitch, If he gets really desperate, he may start to rap or dance. 920 00:16:35,000 --> 00:16:36,000 with this broomstick. 921 00:16:36,000 --> 00:16:37,000 GRANDDAD: Boys, don't make any noise. Shh. 922 00:16:37,000 --> 00:16:38,000 Sweetest Taboo. I was wondering if you would be interested 923 00:16:38,000 --> 00:16:39,000 Now, she's gonna help you learn how to in rapping with me on this song? STINKMEANER: You all, uh, testicles 924 00:16:39,000 --> 00:16:40,000 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. 925 00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:41,000 reestablish dominance at home. 926 00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:42,000 I ain't seen no naked pictures, girl. 927 00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:43,000 Send them to my Sidekick. But no curse words. 928 00:16:43,000 --> 00:16:44,000 Hello. Heh. 929 00:16:44,000 --> 00:16:45,000 And none of them crazy metaphors -- Taboo will be playing the role of your wife. 930 00:16:45,000 --> 00:16:46,000 There's powerful niggadry at work here. I'm Tom. May I speak to Robert or the boys, please? 931 00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:47,000 Now, approach Taboo, 932 00:16:47,000 --> 00:16:48,000 None of that garbage. Just stick to the point. 933 00:16:48,000 --> 00:16:49,000 grab her arm firmly 934 00:16:49,000 --> 00:16:50,000 RUCKUS: Ah... Who's there, huh? 935 00:16:50,000 --> 00:16:51,000 Can I, um, use the bathroom? ...wrong house. 936 00:16:51,000 --> 00:16:52,000 Okay. 937 00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:53,000 Sarah, get your behind-- 938 00:16:53,000 --> 00:16:54,000 There something wrong with your bathroom? 939 00:16:54,000 --> 00:16:55,000 I been waiting on this day Um, this might seem strange, 940 00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:56,000 Oh, hush, boy. I can rap. Yeah, yeah, I'm still here. Motherfucker done shot me. 941 00:16:56,000 --> 00:16:57,000 since your little uppity ass came into town. 942 00:16:57,000 --> 00:16:58,000 Do I have to call her a bitch, really? Big Tank, please make it hot, player. 943 00:16:58,000 --> 00:17:00,000 Yes, Tom. You have to call her a bitch. 944 00:17:00,000 --> 00:17:01,000 GRANDDAD: I don't get it. Yeah, this rap go out to Punknificent 945 00:17:01,000 --> 00:17:02,000 Trust me on this one. Oh, jeez. 946 00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:03,000 I've done the research. Now, try again. 947 00:17:03,000 --> 00:17:04,000 Why your dumbass robbing people? Well, ha, this is awkward, but, um, how do I do this? Okay. 948 00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:06,000 'Cause I'm an American. Shit. 949 00:17:06,000 --> 00:17:07,000 It's the American way, man. Shit. 950 00:17:07,000 --> 00:17:08,000 Bitch, get your behind-- 951 00:17:08,000 --> 00:17:09,000 Is that all you got, nigga? You won't kill me, Air Marshal 50 Cent. 952 00:17:09,000 --> 00:17:10,000 Ass. and it reads: 953 00:17:10,000 --> 00:17:11,000 See, as I broke it down to Ed, pops, 954 00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:12,000 "Dear Tom, my granddad kicked a woman named Luna--" That's just the tip of this iceberg. 955 00:17:12,000 --> 00:17:13,000 You'll only die trying. if people don't have a need, then there won't be no demand, 956 00:17:13,000 --> 00:17:14,000 That would be you, heh-heh. 957 00:17:14,000 --> 00:17:15,000 Read, nigga, read! 958 00:17:15,000 --> 00:17:16,000 No! Kiss my ass, you little-dick, faggot motherfucker. 959 00:17:16,000 --> 00:17:18,000 Or, uh, I'm, uh-- 960 00:17:18,000 --> 00:17:19,000 Or... Turns out Ed and Rummy were breaking into homes 961 00:17:19,000 --> 00:17:20,000 Or I'm gonna die... 962 00:17:20,000 --> 00:17:21,000 "Best regards, Huey Freeman. with Usher in the first place! 963 00:17:21,000 --> 00:17:22,000 trying. This motherfucker went YouTube? 964 00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:23,000 What? What? 965 00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:24,000 You thought you was the only one which was owned by Ed's grandfather. 966 00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:25,000 We may be locked in our rooms." who mastered the ancient and deadly art of the nunchaku? 967 00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:26,000 It's now tragically obvious 968 00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:27,000 The irony is, Granddad had already signed up Oh, me and Robert patched things up. 969 00:17:27,000 --> 00:17:28,000 that reasoning with the bitch 970 00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:29,000 for Wuncler Security. 971 00:17:29,000 --> 00:17:30,000 is not gonna work, Tom. Hey, yo, word to mother-- 972 00:17:30,000 --> 00:17:32,000 You have to hit her. Repeat after me the holy phrase: It's just that he goes on to say: 973 00:17:32,000 --> 00:17:33,000 Oh, hey, hey, Mom. I am an assistant district attorney, for chrissake. 974 00:17:33,000 --> 00:17:34,000 Heh. Well, now, y'all get it right next time. 975 00:17:34,000 --> 00:17:35,000 Tom... 976 00:17:35,000 --> 00:17:37,000 you have to get past this. Nigga, get your black ass outta here. 977 00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:38,000 It's okay, faggot...really. RUCKUS: Yeah, take that 978 00:17:38,000 --> 00:17:39,000 I see. See, faggot? She just gave you permission. 979 00:17:39,000 --> 00:17:40,000 Hey, thanks for being so cool about this, pops. outta here. 980 00:17:40,000 --> 00:17:41,000 This little old dude, Ma. Just one. 981 00:17:41,000 --> 00:17:42,000 Ah. My chin-- You see that? "PPPS: Uh, be careful, she's very danger--" 982 00:17:42,000 --> 00:17:43,000 Anyway, Granddad got his car back, and that was that. 983 00:17:43,000 --> 00:17:44,000 Bitch is hittin' you. All right, lady. 984 00:17:44,000 --> 00:17:45,000 Whoa! 985 00:17:45,000 --> 00:17:46,000 Okay-- Ow! 'Cause I do. Mom, I'm in a meeting. 986 00:17:46,000 --> 00:17:48,000 You're definitely allowed by law to hit her now, Tom. ALL: Nigga, get your black ass 987 00:17:48,000 --> 00:17:50,000 It's self-defense. I didn't do anything. MASTER: Flawless victory. 988 00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:51,000 Okay? Sweetest Taboo, Hey, Ed, give your granddaddy my best. 989 00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:52,000 Oh, okay, okay, cool. ALL: Nigga, get your black ass 990 00:17:52,000 --> 00:17:53,000 Luna, this has gone far enough. 991 00:17:53,000 --> 00:17:54,000 I will. I'm gonna call you back, Mommy. 992 00:17:54,000 --> 00:17:55,000 This isn't an exorcism, it's a beating. 993 00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:56,000 I love you, too. 994 00:17:56,000 --> 00:17:57,000 This is my state-of-the-art surveillance center. 995 00:17:57,000 --> 00:17:58,000 They did it. 996 00:17:58,000 --> 00:17:59,000 Why does a pimp need a surveillance center? I was falling in love with you, Robert. 997 00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:00,000 ALL: Nigga, get your black ass Hey, are we gonna fuck this old-ass nigga up? 998 00:18:00,000 --> 00:18:01,000 Here's 50. 999 00:18:01,000 --> 00:18:02,000 Now, you know, I don't hate old people. Ah... 1000 00:18:02,000 --> 00:18:03,000 is state-of-the-art bitch surveillance. 1001 00:18:03,000 --> 00:18:04,000 Your mothers ain't shit. What others? Who are these others? 1002 00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:06,000 Come, negro-san. Them ain't no negroes! It couldn't be them. 1003 00:18:06,000 --> 00:18:07,000 Just 'cause you lived a long life, your wife's conversations and e-mails. 1004 00:18:07,000 --> 00:18:08,000 don't mean it can't come to a short end, nigga. 1005 00:18:08,000 --> 00:18:09,000 Daddy, I've got transcripts of all her conversations today. HUEY: Several hours later, very, very sad story of Luna. 1006 00:18:09,000 --> 00:18:10,000 WOMAN: No way. 1007 00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:11,000 No mention of Usher. 1008 00:18:11,000 --> 00:18:12,000 I'm hacking into her e-mail now, What's up, world? This is Sway. 1009 00:18:12,000 --> 00:18:13,000 That was great, Granddad. 1010 00:18:13,000 --> 00:18:14,000 Law-enforcement sources have confirmed but, tsk, this computer is running a bit slow. 1011 00:18:14,000 --> 00:18:15,000 Boy, I wish we could've seen the end of that movie. 1012 00:18:15,000 --> 00:18:16,000 that two Cleveland teens have been arrested 1013 00:18:16,000 --> 00:18:17,000 I don't know. he's got nigga in him. 1014 00:18:17,000 --> 00:18:18,000 I feel bad for leaving Huey and what's-her-name. When I turned 17, I ran away to Hong Kong, 1015 00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:19,000 Bitch, don't start with that 1016 00:18:19,000 --> 00:18:20,000 They knew the risks. 1017 00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:21,000 Ow! So they might do a little time. where I met Triad boss Kenny Woo, my first love. 1018 00:18:21,000 --> 00:18:22,000 You say that shit every time a new iMac comes out. GHOSTFACE: What the fuck is wrong 1019 00:18:22,000 --> 00:18:23,000 We see 'em when they get out. 1020 00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:24,000 Uh...it doesn't seem right. One of the teens reportedly told police, 1021 00:18:24,000 --> 00:18:25,000 You ain't slick. You better 1022 00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:26,000 I'm going back and turning myself in. and what you gonna say to the cops? 1023 00:18:26,000 --> 00:18:27,000 and stop playin' with me. 1024 00:18:27,000 --> 00:18:28,000 Turn yourself--? Man-- 1025 00:18:28,000 --> 00:18:29,000 Yes, Daddy. and that makes it cool." 1026 00:18:29,000 --> 00:18:30,000 Granddad, look, come on. It wasn't the last incident. 1027 00:18:30,000 --> 00:18:31,000 Someone stole my bike. I mean, I love Huey. Almost like a brother. 1028 00:18:31,000 --> 00:18:32,000 Does she have a MySpace page? I told you not to wash Can you just tell me what to do, so I can go to bed? 1029 00:18:32,000 --> 00:18:33,000 my bloody ski mask with detergent But what's done is done. We got to let go of the past. 1030 00:18:33,000 --> 00:18:34,000 attributed to the beef have broke out, Spinning, baby! 1031 00:18:34,000 --> 00:18:35,000 I don't think Sarah would have a-- 1032 00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:36,000 including two in Lithuania and one in Tokyo. 1033 00:18:36,000 --> 00:18:37,000 If he don't come back, can I have his side of the room? 1034 00:18:37,000 --> 00:18:38,000 Huh. Spiritual. Look at you. 1035 00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:39,000 Uh, since when did she have a MySpace page? The AARP announced a boycott of Thugnificent's record label. 1036 00:18:39,000 --> 00:18:40,000 Nobody wants you but me. 1037 00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:41,000 Ah, come on, Granddad. Peace? Peace? Peace. 1038 00:18:41,000 --> 00:18:42,000 You know what her password might be? 1039 00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:43,000 You supposed to be setting a better example. 1040 00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:44,000 You without me equals shit. Stinkmeaner, you hate black people, don't you? 1041 00:18:44,000 --> 00:18:45,000 You just wait till the manager gets here. could soon explode into more violence. 1042 00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:46,000 each other's middle names as passwords, You understand that, you ugly, fat bitch? 1043 00:18:46,000 --> 00:18:47,000 I sure do. 1044 00:18:47,000 --> 00:18:48,000 He gonna throw the book at both of y'all. Man, Thugnificent ain't telling nobody 1045 00:18:48,000 --> 00:18:49,000 That's L-A-N-- Got it. I mean, I hate everyone in general, 1046 00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:50,000 This is the worst day... Now, let me borrow your car. 1047 00:18:50,000 --> 00:18:51,000 Password is "Usher." Here we go. I don't even really see how someone could even 1048 00:18:51,000 --> 00:18:52,000 Nothin'. 1049 00:18:52,000 --> 00:18:53,000 get something like that outta that song. Where's your bike? of my entire life. 1050 00:18:53,000 --> 00:18:54,000 They're getting together at 3:00 1051 00:18:54,000 --> 00:18:55,000 I wouldn't exactly call them people, but yeah. 1052 00:18:55,000 --> 00:18:56,000 Told you. what he's going through, 1053 00:18:56,000 --> 00:18:57,000 That's in an hour. We have to go. 1054 00:18:57,000 --> 00:18:58,000 Yeah, I have a deep distaste for Negroids. 1055 00:18:58,000 --> 00:18:59,000 I hope you got some insurance on those spinners. 1056 00:18:59,000 --> 00:19:00,000 Here's the guardian for the kids. Maybe you should go see a therapist. You smell me? You know, 1057 00:19:00,000 --> 00:19:01,000 That's right, Ruckus. Right, right. And, Stinkmeaner, I bet you hate rap music. 1058 00:19:01,000 --> 00:19:02,000 We snuck into the movie, too. 1059 00:19:02,000 --> 00:19:03,000 then going there won't help. My friend Nicole says it's men like you, Robert, 1060 00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:04,000 We? You said you was gonna turn yourself in. who lie and avoid commitment. Thank you for not snitching! 1061 00:19:04,000 --> 00:19:05,000 You know what I mean? 1062 00:19:05,000 --> 00:19:06,000 I paid you $2000, and $500 as well. 1063 00:19:06,000 --> 00:19:07,000 Ladies and gentlemen, Heh-heh. "Stanky-booty." Please. Let the kids go. I'll take responsibility. 1064 00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:08,000 what started as a simple disagreement between neighbors 1065 00:19:08,000 --> 00:19:09,000 I must say that's a brilliant observation, 'Meaner. 1066 00:19:09,000 --> 00:19:10,000 Now, Tom, I hope you can appreciate 1067 00:19:10,000 --> 00:19:11,000 Look like y'all all going down. 1068 00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:12,000 our no-refunds policy. a nigga moment 1069 00:19:12,000 --> 00:19:13,000 How about a complimentary date with Sweetest Taboo? 1070 00:19:13,000 --> 00:19:14,000 The manager's not coming. generational tribalism. 1071 00:19:14,000 --> 00:19:15,000 Cinema's closed indefinitely. 1072 00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:16,000 No, no, no. Fortunately, a robust exchange of ideas has taken place, 1073 00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:17,000 Damn it, Luna. Stop being a victim. Looks like everyone walked out. Something about a union. 1074 00:19:17,000 --> 00:19:18,000 and we're going now. 1075 00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:19,000 and we are hopeful to having a resolution shortly. 1076 00:19:19,000 --> 00:19:20,000 What? The manager ain't coming? 1077 00:19:20,000 --> 00:19:21,000 Ohh... 'cause I was afraid you'd do something like this. 1078 00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:22,000 Thank you. 1079 00:19:22,000 --> 00:19:23,000 Well, call the police. And look. I was right. 1080 00:19:23,000 --> 00:19:25,000 Don't take your past out on other people. The FBI. Homeland Security. 1081 00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:26,000 Yeah, bitch. Let's go. 1082 00:19:26,000 --> 00:19:27,000 You mean, we gonna let 1083 00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:29,000 What's a nigga want? Try to whup me. this African hooliganism go unpunished? 1084 00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:30,000 Whup your ass, nigga. 1085 00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:31,000 You have problems, Mr. Freeman, and you need help. You know who you messin' with, nigga? 1086 00:19:31,000 --> 00:19:32,000 And you can't kidnap people just because they don't like you. 1087 00:19:32,000 --> 00:19:33,000 Thanks for coming back... 1088 00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:34,000 Would somebody here please be an adult? 1089 00:19:34,000 --> 00:19:35,000 eventually. 1090 00:19:35,000 --> 00:19:36,000 Yo, you need to stop snitching, Granddad. 1091 00:19:36,000 --> 00:19:37,000 Oh, you're right. 1092 00:19:37,000 --> 00:19:38,000 THUGNIFICENT: Hey, man, you know what? 1093 00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:39,000 Ah. Ow. Hey. I didn't even wanna kidnap you. 1094 00:19:39,000 --> 00:19:40,000 Why don't you call social services 1095 00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:41,000 We're neighbors. and turn yourself in for child abuse? 1096 00:19:41,000 --> 00:19:43,000 We have to learn to live together. 1097 00:19:43,000 --> 00:19:44,000 Oh. I'm never gonna get married. 1098 00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:45,000 Yeah. Exactly. 1099 00:19:45,000 --> 00:19:46,000 Exactly. That's what I'm talking about. 1100 00:19:46,000 --> 00:19:47,000 I might as well just blow myself up right now. 1101 00:19:47,000 --> 00:19:48,000 Remember to hit the bitch. 1102 00:19:48,000 --> 00:19:49,000 Hey, man. : Hey, guys. 1103 00:19:49,000 --> 00:19:50,000 to look at it, Thugnificent. 1104 00:19:50,000 --> 00:19:51,000 Thank you so much for doing that. I mean, you guys Not that I'm pole-jocking or nothing. 1105 00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:52,000 You guys unionized and staged a walkout that quickly? 1106 00:19:52,000 --> 00:19:53,000 just went above and beyond. Hey, everybody good in here? Beverages? 1107 00:19:53,000 --> 00:19:54,000 I mean, really-- 1108 00:19:54,000 --> 00:19:55,000 That's amazing. You a beautiful, talented woman. 1109 00:19:55,000 --> 00:19:56,000 Oh, yeah. We unionized. 1110 00:19:56,000 --> 00:19:57,000 I mean, bitch... 1111 00:19:57,000 --> 00:19:58,000 Then someone called the corporate headquarters, What about you, big guy? You good? 1112 00:19:58,000 --> 00:19:59,000 and they shut down the whole place. Possessed or not, you gonna fix my damn house. 1113 00:19:59,000 --> 00:20:00,000 Fired everybody. 1114 00:20:00,000 --> 00:20:01,000 Are you sure I shouldn't just blow myself up? 1115 00:20:01,000 --> 00:20:02,000 Oh. You gonna have another demon, 1116 00:20:02,000 --> 00:20:03,000 Well, um... 1117 00:20:03,000 --> 00:20:04,000 Hey. 1118 00:20:04,000 --> 00:20:05,000 power to the people? Let me get that for you, homey. 1119 00:20:05,000 --> 00:20:06,000 Fuck you. 1120 00:20:06,000 --> 00:20:07,000 Any of y'all need a coaster? 1121 00:20:07,000 --> 00:20:08,000 Tom, please calm down a real good question. Billy Blanks always says: "Take control of your life. 1122 00:20:08,000 --> 00:20:10,000 and let me go. 1123 00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:11,000 Why are you in my bed? Take responsibility." 1124 00:20:11,000 --> 00:20:12,000 All the beds in this house 1125 00:20:12,000 --> 00:20:13,000 Well, that's that. 1126 00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:15,000 I think we all learned a valuable lesson today Courteous. What about the loud party? 1127 00:20:15,000 --> 00:20:17,000 about stealing movies. Nigga, you gave us permission to have that party. 1128 00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:18,000 Buy the bootleg. 1129 00:20:18,000 --> 00:20:20,000 Or just download it from the Internet 1130 00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:21,000 like everybody else. 1131 00:20:22,000 --> 00:20:23,000 Ah! 1132 00:20:23,000 --> 00:20:24,000 The hell--? TOM: You can't have my wife! 1133 00:20:24,000 --> 00:20:25,000 NICOLE: You got him, girl? 1134 00:20:25,000 --> 00:20:26,000 Hey, uh, I think I'm gonna go 1135 00:20:26,000 --> 00:20:27,000 Tom! 1136 00:20:27,000 --> 00:20:28,000 Daddy. What did you do to Usher? 1137 00:20:28,000 --> 00:20:29,000 He told me I should take responsibility 1138 00:20:29,000 --> 00:20:30,000 Hey. Can you guys wait here a sec? 1139 00:20:30,000 --> 00:20:31,000 I make some mean guacamole -- 1140 00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:32,000 There's something I need to take care of. Well, what about parking all those damn cars 1141 00:20:32,000 --> 00:20:34,000 Daddy. Leave Usher alone. 1142 00:20:34,000 --> 00:20:35,000 on my yard and ruining my lawn? 1143 00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:36,000 What are you doing? 1144 00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:38,000 Hm. You know what? Why are you trying to kill Usher? 1145 00:20:38,000 --> 00:20:39,000 Niggas was passed out by then. 1146 00:20:39,000 --> 00:20:40,000 Yes, Super Fly. What did Usher ever do to you? 1147 00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:41,000 We was fixing to come over and apologize. 1148 00:20:41,000 --> 00:20:42,000 Jazmine wanted to meet Usher. 1149 00:20:42,000 --> 00:20:43,000 But then you had to go off and start filing complaints 1150 00:20:43,000 --> 00:20:44,000 You're an animal. 1151 00:20:44,000 --> 00:20:45,000 and doing all that old gay shit. 1152 00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:46,000 Is Usher okay? 1153 00:20:46,000 --> 00:20:47,000 THUGNIFICENT: And you know what hurts me 1154 00:20:47,000 --> 00:20:48,000 So you're not--? No. 1155 00:20:48,000 --> 00:20:49,000 If a man said that to me, oh, my God, 1156 00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:50,000 I don't think I could handle it. GUARD: Uh-huh, uh-huh. Easy, boys. 1157 00:20:50,000 --> 00:20:51,000 That's a really powerful sentiment 1158 00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:52,000 Ow! 1159 00:20:52,000 --> 00:20:53,000 Yeah, nigga. Ms. Luna decided 1160 00:20:53,000 --> 00:20:54,000 TOM: Oh, okay. I see what this is. 1161 00:20:54,000 --> 00:20:55,000 SARAH: Stop! Don't hurt him. 1162 00:20:55,000 --> 00:20:57,000 Well, what about all that stuff in the video, huh? 1163 00:20:57,000 --> 00:20:58,000 She still there? Why ain't she leaving? 1164 00:20:58,000 --> 00:20:59,000 Oh, nigga, that was just entertainment. 1165 00:20:59,000 --> 00:21:00,000 You being real sensitive right now, man. 1166 00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:01,000 Well, I hope her friend isn't giving her more bad-- 1167 00:21:01,000 --> 00:21:02,000 Yeah, man. Anybody could see 1168 00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:03,000 He didn't mean it. 1169 00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:05,000 He was trying to hit me. 1170 00:21:05,000 --> 00:21:08,000 Tom! TOM: Granddad, if you apologize to Thugnificent 1171 00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:09,000 Ms. Luna let her girlfriend I'm sorry, Usher! 1172 00:21:09,000 --> 00:21:11,000 then I'm sure, Thugnificent, 1173 00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:12,000 you will be willing to apologize for the video. 1174 00:21:12,000 --> 00:21:13,000 USHER: Shut the fuck up, for her own actions. 1175 00:21:13,000 --> 00:21:15,000 This weekend sucked. 1176 00:21:15,000 --> 00:21:16,000 And it was all your fault, Granddad. 1177 00:21:16,000 --> 00:21:17,000 Wasn't my fault. 1178 00:21:17,000 --> 00:21:18,000 It was that crazy-ass Luna's fault 1179 00:21:18,000 --> 00:21:20,000 Hell, no, I ain't apologizing, punk-ass nigga. 1180 00:21:20,000 --> 00:21:21,000 God rest her poor soul. 1181 00:21:21,000 --> 00:21:23,000 Kiss my ass, old-ass nigga. 1182 00:21:23,000 --> 00:21:24,000 Wait, wait, wait, wait! Please. Stupid-ass-- 1183 00:21:24,000 --> 00:21:26,000 What was that noise? 1184 00:21:26,000 --> 00:21:27,000 Can we at least agree, 1185 00:21:27,000 --> 00:21:28,000 for the sake of old people everywhere, 1186 00:21:28,000 --> 00:21:29,000 if a man ever said that to me, I'll kill myself. 1187 00:21:29,000 --> 00:21:30,000 that there will be no more dis records? 1188 00:21:30,000 --> 00:21:32,000 I mean, you're a stronger woman than me. Hello? 1189 00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:35,000 Fine, whatever. I spits hot fire. 1190 00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:37,000 I'll eat your ass up on the M-I-C, 1191 00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:39,000 if you keep messing with me. 1192 00:21:40,000 --> 00:21:41,000 That's what you need to do. 1193 00:21:45,000 --> 00:21:46,000 You gonna pay for my lawn, boy. 1194 00:21:46,000 --> 00:21:48,000 Eat a dick, old nigga. 1195 00:21:50,000 --> 00:21:52,000 Yeah, you know, what Rags to Bitches means 1196 00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:55,000 is that there's more to life than what you're born into. 1197 00:21:55,000 --> 00:21:58,000 There's also bitches.